The Sorcerer's Drumsticks

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Fantasy  |  House: Booksie Classic
Alack! The legendry spoof of LOTR has now finished. READ IT ALL HERE!!!

Like Lord of the Rings? If you don't - read this. If you do - read this.
It's a win win situation!


Written not by me, but my sister Rachel, when she was in secondary school, this novel will probably make no sense whatsoever. But nevermind, lets roll...

Table of Contents

The Sorcerer's Drumsticks

Submitted: May 17, 2007

the legendry spoof of LOTR is here.
Written not by me, but my sister Rachel, when she was in secondary school, this novel will probably make no sense whatsoever. But nevermind, lets roll... Read Chapter

Round the Corner and Up the Bend

Submitted: May 18, 2007

The days wore on as Bob, Barney and Bumbry slowly plodded through thick marshes, scary woods, dangerous motorways and deserted train stat... Read Chapter

At The Inn of the Leaping Unicorn

Submitted: May 18, 2007

Eventually, after 7 stops at various 'Welcome Breaks' on route, they got to the Leaping Unicorn. They were all knackered and Barney had b... Read Chapter

The Great Wizard SteveyDee

Submitted: May 20, 2007

Bob went and pulled Barney up from the floor and grabbed Bumbry who was about to order his fourth vanilla coke and was looking a bit too ... Read Chapter

The Random Chapter with No Name

Submitted: May 21, 2007

Chapter 5 - The random chapter without a name. SteveyDee, Bob, Barney and Bumbry managed to get out of the Leaping Unicorn unnoticed.... Read Chapter

The Attack of the PCC

Submitted: May 22, 2007

Chapter 6 - The Attack of the PCC. "O.K, here's what we do", said SteveyDee. "RUN!" Bumbry looked doubtful. "Why don't we jus... Read Chapter

The Journey to Treacle Creek

Submitted: May 23, 2007

Chapter 7 - The Journey to Treacle Creek. Scarlett promptly picked Bob up and put him on her motorbike. SteveyDee took her to on side... Read Chapter

The Council at Treacle Creek

Submitted: May 25, 2007

Chapter 8 - The Council at Treacle Creek A couple of days passed and Bob slowly regained his strength. Bob, Barney, Bumbry and Stevey... Read Chapter

Teatime

Submitted: May 25, 2007

Chapter 9 - Teatime. So, the forum of youngsters had been chosen. They were about to depart on a long, hard, dirty, expedition throug... Read Chapter

The Salt Mines of Chukaya

Submitted: May 27, 2007

Chapter 10 - The Salt Mines of Chukaya. The journey through the mines was long, cold and wet. Many bizarre and odd-looking creatures ... Read Chapter

The great apprentice PeateeDee Feat. The Achan Sisters

Submitted: May 27, 2007

Chapter 11 - The great apprentice PeateeDee Feat. The Achan Sisters. The George Michael impostor peered at the group of weary loo... Read Chapter

Yes, its time for the baddie to appear, get ready to boo and hiss.

Submitted: May 28, 2007

Chapter 12 - Yes, its time for the baddie to appear, get ready to boo and hiss. After the TYWARF had polished off all the food in the... Read Chapter

'Tragedy! When the feeling's gone and you can't go on, it's tragedy!'

Submitted: May 29, 2007

Chapter 13 - 'Tragedy! When the feeling's gone and you can't go on, it's tragedy!' It was certainly a tragedy. The group were now in ... Read Chapter

"So long, farewell, auf wiedersehn, goodbyeeee."

Submitted: May 30, 2007

Chapter 14 - "So long, farewell, auf wiedersehn, goodbyeeee." A melancholy atmosphere swamped that afternoon in Castle Estarah. As th... Read Chapter

Now they really are going to go. Honest.

Submitted: May 31, 2007

Chapter 15 - Now they really are going to go. Honest. After the celebrations of the night before, the group were feeling a tad hung o... Read Chapter

PeateeDee, you numptie.

Submitted: June 01, 2007

Chapter 16 - PeateeDee, you numptie. After a great kafuffle with the tube and ticket barriers, the group heaved their luggage up some... Read Chapter

Wash some cars, cut down jungles, play That Funky Music

Submitted: June 01, 2007

Chapter 17 - Wash some cars, cut down jungles, Play that funky music. Although PeateeDee had to stick to his promises, the fact t... Read Chapter

Ladies and Gentlemen, Tresham Gruver!!!!

Submitted: June 03, 2007

Chapter 18 - Ladies and Gentlemen, Tresham Gruver!!!! Once they had wandered down the hill, they stopped and simultaneously realised ... Read Chapter

An unexpected (but welcome) guest.

Submitted: June 03, 2007

Chapter 19 - An unexpected (but welcome) guest. However, as has become custom, this wasn't as easy as it sounded. Alack, they did not... Read Chapter

"Once I was afraid, I was petrified…"

Submitted: June 04, 2007

Chapter 20 - "Once I was afraid, I was petrified..." Finally, the last stretch of the TYWARF's journey was underway. That was, after ... Read Chapter

It's a 3, or a green, or a green 3! (ED. Uno Staco that is...)

Submitted: June 05, 2007

Chapter 21 - It's a 3 or a green or a green 3! Bob awoke with a start, a sharp pain in his chest. He staggered up and pulled the drum... Read Chapter

Back in Black

Submitted: June 06, 2007

Chapter 22 - Back in Black Bob and Barney journeyed through the night and by daybreak they were knackered. They found a place to rest... Read Chapter

A friend in need goes to a friend on Mount Spaghetti.

Submitted: June 07, 2007

Chapter 23 - A friend in need goes to a friend on Mount Spaghetti. The footsteps were getting louder and the mountain was starting to... Read Chapter

It's not an espionage real-time TV thriller starring Keifer Sutherland.

Submitted: June 08, 2007

Chapter 24 - It's not an espionage real-time TV thriller starring Keifer Sutherland. The sun lounge was a much smaller affair and all... Read Chapter

The Vengeance of Daytime Television

Submitted: June 10, 2007

Chapter 25 - The Vengeance of Daytime Television "We'll be safe in here", said SteveyDee. The group paused for a minute to get th... Read Chapter

One slice of carrot cake and a cream horn

Submitted: June 11, 2007

Chapter 26 - One slice of carrot cake and a cream horn Scarlett and the gang chugged their way down the fairly quiet dual carriageway... Read Chapter

'It's the final countdown' (da-da-da-daaa, da-da-da-da-daaaaa)

Submitted: June 12, 2007

Chapter 27 - 'It's the final countdown' (da-da-da-daaa, da-da-da-da-daaaaa) Amber, Bumbry and PeateeDee looked extremely pleased with... Read Chapter

The eponymy (ed: only the epilogue to go)

Submitted: June 13, 2007

Chapter 28 - The eponymy Whilst the majority of the TYWARF had been fighting the forces of evil on one side of the mountain, Bob and ... Read Chapter

Epilogue

Submitted: June 14, 2007

Epilogue Later that evening, the gang had a right old knees up and found that Arun had done some serious co-ordinating when Neil and ... Read Chapter