Pirate Rap

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic

Yo ho ho! I wrote a song about pirates!

If you got a hook for a hand say yarr!
If you got patch on your eye say yarr! 
If you got a peg for a leg say yarrrr!
Har har har! raise up the anchorrr, har! har! har!
there be only one life for me, the life of rum drinking pirate out at sea
robbing every trade ship and town that I please,
I'm a rude talkin, swash bucklin, evil S.O.B
me and me crew we barely get to sleep,
to busy making eye patches and peg legs for the men who lost their feet 
were the baddest bunch of buccaneers to ever bleed the monkey,
and by the wind ya bully rag, don't ya ever try and cross me, 
cuz if ya do, me ruthless crew, we'll be leavin ya for a while,
marooned to die on a sandy pile, on a deserted ocean isle, Har! Har!
Me mateys on me cursed ship all be straight from hell,
there be Stab Joy McKilligan, Ronny the Rapist and Al
and Bleeding Bill Blunderbuss, a sea dog we should thank, 
he's yer matey who forced the sea hags to swab yer poop decks
and walk yer plank! 
so if you'd like to be a freebooter, or just got kicked out by yer mom, 
fax or email your resume to cap'nbootytaker@hotmail.com, har har!
If ye's looking for a life where ye can rape and plunder,
come and join me wicked crew! I'll be accepting applications all summerrr
you'll learn to drink and fight and stink and soon you will agree, 
yer mateys some rum and the open sea, that's all we sea dogs really need! 
cuz its the pirate life for me! Yarrrr!

Submitted: June 17, 2013

© Copyright 2021 matto. All rights reserved.

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Add Your Comments:


Victoria Blood


Tue, November 5th, 2013 6:41pm

unmasked delusions

ha nice I felt like I went on an adventure. I wanted to grab a sword :) very nicely put, was a fun read

Mon, May 5th, 2014 11:08pm


I felt like I should be on the high seas. I think you captured that feeling of being a pirate well, and it was nice to see that pirates can recruit through email now. Great, fun poem

Sun, February 21st, 2021 10:24pm

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