Nightmares Still Exist

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Gay and Lesbian  |  House: Booksie Classic
Warning: this story contains violent actions. It's a one shot with my pairing Javier x Nathan. Nathan is being attacked by a group of aggressive and gay-hating people on the street. I just wanted to write this because it's stuck in my head for a couple of days now, and I don't want to get another nightmare... So I just wrote it down. I always feel connected with my characters, so I admit it; I almost cried when I was writing it. I hope you'll enjoy to read this as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Submitted: July 09, 2012

A A A | A A A

Submitted: July 09, 2012




With a soft click I closed the door of the studio behind me. It was Friday afternoon and Javier was not home yet. He worked in the supermarket a few blocks away. Once again he had forgotten his lunch, and I was going to bring it to him. It was a rainy day. Drops splashed apart on the sidewalk, and especially on me. I pulled my black hat on my head a little deeper and putted my hood on, so the cold water wouldn't freeze my neck. My jacket was quite warm and waterproof, but I found the weather always so depressing when it rained. It made me feel quite down. Despite my warm jacket, I shivered. It was also almost the end of autumn and the temperatures dropped more and more. I dodged the puddles that had formed on the sidewalk and crossed the street, after I checked if there was no car approaching. The idea that I would see Javier, made me slightly happier. I was too young to work full-time, and he insisted that I went to school. As often as possible. It was still a dangerous neighborhood, and I preferred to skip the lessons rather than I had to go to that place. My father could find me there. Although it is already more than a year ago, I still lived in fear that he would return to complete his job. And the way to school was the ideal to get it done. I had to walk through some abandoned streets. I only wanted to go if my boyfriend came with me, to guide me. At school, most pupils themselves knew about my relationship, so I was often bullied. Especially because I'm not awfully good at defending myself. I was not big or muscular, but rather a slender kid who had not the strength to fight back. And so I was left alone in the studio and Javier went to work. After a long time he had also realized that it was the best, both for me and for him. If I was gone, he is also concerned. He is less afraid than I, more bitter, because we both knew that the hatred of my father wouldn't pass that quickly.

I was glad when I noticed how the rain subsided and finally ceased. The light gray clouds didn't disappear, but at least it was pleasant to walk. The sky was bleak and it seemed as if a painter had simply forgotten to give the air a color. I hit the corner and finally came to the street where Javier worked. Unfortunately I had to walk five more minutes. I did not really care, though I longed for the moment that he would close his arms around me and warm me up a bit. My wet clothes weighed heavily and it sucked the heat from my body. Shouting and more noise caught my attention. I heard running footsteps on the wet asphalt. I looked up and saw five young people looking at each other excitedly as they ran in my direction. Somehow they scared me. I recognized two of them vaguely from school, but the rest of the group was older. I had the strange feeling they were after me. Another 50 meters. Then I was safe."Eay gay boy!" I heard, while the rest laughed aloud. I froze on the spot and I didn't dare to move. I couldn't run, it seemed like I forgot how to use my legs. Before I could do something, they surrounded me. I couldn't escape. I did not know what I was supposed to do or think, so I looked at the ground.

"What are you doing here all alone?" Asked a girl about the same size as I was.

"It can be dangerous for people like you," sneered a boy who was two heads taller than me.

"I was just going to ..." A rough shove against my shoulder made me keep my mouth shut.

"Your opinion was not asked, you idiot," snapped the girl who had pushed me. She had medium length black hair and was taller than me. That was not so difficult, I wasn't that big. The whole group was just bigger than me, except for one of the girls. Three boys, two girls. And apparently they were not going to leave me alone.

"Disgusting, kissing with boys. Javier is his name, isn't it?" Asked a boy I knew from school. If I was right, his name was Oliver.

"Those two are living together in the studio of that dude," inquired the black-haired girl. I did not know how she knew about that.

"Gay people do not belong on this world," spat Oliver. I ignored it, I was used to the insults. It was just the fact that I could not go anywhere that made me terrified. I looked at the sign of the supermarket. 50 meters ...

"You're not going anywhere, pussyboy", said the most frightening of the three boys. He was known as a bully at school, so I knew his name. Taylor grabbed me roughly down my shoulder and pulled my backpack off my back. With a large swing it landed on the pavement a little further. My face turned white and I tried to get away from him. It did not work, he held me too tight.

"I wonder what kind of sound they make when you punch them," said Oliver. He rubbed his chin. I turned my gaze. I would not scream. I. would. not. scream. I promised myself that I would make no sound. The black-haired girl was standing to my left and pulled my hair, so I was forced to lift my head. Oliver grinned. I closed my eyes, trying to prepare myself for the pain. My head was beaten back by the blow. I gasped and there were tears in my eyes immediately.

"Nothing?" Came the surprised voice of the little girl.

"Hit him again," said the third boy, who had said nothing until now.

"Wait a minute, Oli," commanded Taylor. I got a kick in my knee and he pushed me down. My knees hit the sidewalk hard. They felt quite painful. He putted his hand on my shoulder and pushed me against the ground.

"Let me go," I said. My voice sounded pretty solid against all odds, even confident.

"You wish. No, crybaby, we won't let you go. Not yet," said the girl with the black hair, while her fingertips touched my jaw. I pulled my head away and flexed my muscles. I began to resist. I tried to get up. 50 meters.

"You are obstinate. Fool," spat Oliver. He knelt before me and grabbed me by my throat. I swallowed. Don't scream.  He pounded his fist against my face. I immediately tasted blood in my mouth. I clenched my jaw, resisted to make any sound, but a groan of pain escaped my lips when the boy punched me a second time.

"Apparently he is good at moaning," noted the smallest girl derisively. She pushed Oliver on the side. "Can I have some fun right now?" She asked. I hung my head and closed my eyes. It made me so sick. Her hand slid through my hair to my neck. Taylor placed his knees beside my body so I could not move away.

"They say gay boys kiss better. Do me a favor, Nathan. Kiss me," she whispered. She sounded excited and curious. I swallowed the bile in my mouth back. Her hand slid further down and pulled my shirt up. I shuddered with horror. This was not real. This was some kind of twisted dream.

"No," I growled aggressively and I did the only thing I could do. I banged my head against hers. It had taken effect. She screamed and almost fell backwards. My head throbbed in pain and I felt more blood in my mouth. Taylor grunted and knelt behind me. He hit his arm around my throat and cut off my breathing. I grabbed his arm and tried to pull it away, but I was not strong enough. He was much bigger than me and he pulled me back, so my body stretched out. Oliver pushed the unknown boy who stared at me menacingly. Meanwhile, the black-haired girl was helping her friend to get up. The only good thing about this situation was the fact her nose was bleeding bad.

"Come on. This takes too long. Soon someone will notice us," Taylor hissed to the rest of the group. This was the signal for them to continue their attack. They kept hitting, taking turns on my head and stomach. Eventually I didn't feel the pain anymore. My body was numb. I shouted. Loud. Taylor released me and I fell sideways. I could hardly breathe. Sobbing, I crawled away from them.

"Is that it?" I heard the smallest girl vaguely say. She sounded disappointed.

"Nobody's stopping you to continue", said the biggest kid. "But hurry up." A shiver ran down my spine and I crouched against the wall. Nobody said a thing for a few seconds.

"You know what I want," she said coolly. I began to shiver from the cold, the pain and fear. I couldn't bear this any longer. I tried to stand, sought the support of the wall. The stones were cold and rough beneath my fingers. Staggering, I began to limp toward the supermarket. 50 meters. 49 meters ...

They had seen me, of course. The girl stood in front of me and this time Oliver grabbed me tight in my upper arms. She took no chances this time and kept my head between her hands firmly. Her lips touched mine rough. The anger and hatred were clearly felt in her touch. I tried to pull back, but I couldn't. Oliver stood behind me and she pushed her nails into my skin. Silent tears rolled down my cheeks and I remained standing motionless while she went her way.

"Is this all you can, gayboy?" She hissed. Again she pressed her mouth on mine. She bit my lip and it started bleeding. She licked my lips and I shivered again. I wish someone came to help me. There must be someone around, right? The girl tangled her fingers in my dark hair. Her gaze was still full of hatred. I could not bear it and I closed my eyes.

Suddenly I heard running footsteps on the wet asphalt. Oliver made a surprised sound and suddenly the girl was gone. I opened my eyes and saw a vague figure with blond hair for me. He grabbed the girl by her shoulders and pushed her roughly aside.

"Let him go!" Screamed Javier to Oliver, as he menacingly came closer. I was vaguely aware of other people who were running towards us. Probably people who worked in the store. The grip around my shoulders disappeared and Oliver pushed me roughly towards Javier. Luckily he was able to catch me. He pulled me close to him and I hid my face in his jersey.

"Javier?" I muttered softly. I still couldn't believe this all just happened. And I couldn't believe it was over.

"I'm here, Nate. You're safe now," he whispered back. The anger in his voice rang clear. He lifted me with ease. I hit my arms around his neck.

"I don't want to go to school anymore," I sobbed. I behaved like a little child, but I could not help it. My whole body ached and I wanted to go away from this place as quickly as possible.

"Believe me, if they dare to do it again, I will kill them personally," he growled with his teeth clenched.

"Promise?" I asked before I closed my eyes again and pressed me against him.

"I promise."


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