Written for the listless feeling you get at this time of year.

 

The twilight rain, this winter haze, the tangled heart's soliloquoy

Forgive me there, i'm not forgot, to the precious hours of  the habit lost

Piece of mind, pieces of mine, fuelled by dawns sweet daylight lie,

Give me a line and i'll pull you through, as the silver hours shiver for you

Wrap them up, and send them back, on a broken ship with lifeless helm

Dewdrops for the nephilim, singing Jesus won't you let me in?

I'll cast you down, to the rigmarole, sneaking a laugh

You're so very drole

December days sparkle in you, I don't have to tell you what you want me to

Concubine sees, missives minds eye

Days in December, just pass on by.


Submitted: February 11, 2007

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Nick Dwyer

Another 5.

If I wasn't so drunk and it wasn't so late I'd query your rhythmic meandering from the mean at times.

"The twilight rain, this winter haze, the tangled heart's soliloquoy

Forgive me there, i'm not forgot, to the precious hours of the habit lost"

would have more funk at heart as

"The twilight rain, this winter haze, the tangled heart's soliloquy

Forgive me there, I'm not forgot, to precious hours of habit lost"


But that would be churlish of me to quibble. This is aesthetically whole and very very full of genuine poetic image making. You have talent.

Sat, February 17th, 2007 3:18am

Author
Reply

Thanks, appreciated as ever.

Sun, March 11th, 2007 4:35pm

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