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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Religion and Spirituality  |  House: Booksie Classic

Hey, once up on time, I had a name Fred But now I have another name, street name De Gayi or Nirvana, so call me “the Guy or Nirvana” Street became my chosen family. Snitches spread the roomers;
That father was the rich nigga, Mother left when I was four Now I am 21, I don’t know if she’s alive or dead. I should ask why I live in this hell, But I was a gangster now a believer And both
don’t ask questions. When I look back to my childhood I see nothing but shit.

My dreams were to grow stronger and be able to kick my f**** dad ass, Who f**** mother and leave, He who proposed to abort me not to raise, Who abandoned mother until she left.

I wished to born before them maybe I would be their parents not mine Oh, I was stunned.

Yes, I have seen your lough at me As if I ate food from the dusk-bin, I have seen your look of disgusted And even hear you say yuck.. I saw you, the riches crossing across the street ,Paying to
avoid me being near you and your dearest cars, Over clothing and feeding your lovely families , I always met your ‘dope’ I doubly guess, one of you is my dad.

Man, who though why I live on the street? Before going further please “your excellencies, while you’re planning the street building and maintaining budgets, please remember to add some minimum
amount of money for solving the problems the street you built will cause ‘especially the street kids’ please remember to help the kinder parent street,

the fact to that, when you look back years in Rwanda history, we didn’t face this crisis, we faced it the day we built the streets.”

A child is a free spirit. Please, I needed to find my identity, I needed to search further inner child, To find once more what made me happy.

My life was very busy, looking for surviving, Stealing riches, waking up those were awake But my look still, was it as the same?

My lucky day was that afternoon, When I ate my umungazi, Brought drugs and saved Not for my future project but for new b**** To bend and pause on whole night.

I wanted to figure out why I was busy But I couldn’t find the time to do it Because I was always running down the hills Like my legs were going to give away. Running over nothing but escaping
police, Inkeragutabara was chosen enemy.

Time didn’t stop, did body and mind stop to grow? No, it can’t be, the street kid shift to a gangster, More people wished me to meet the last friend [ death]. I was the question not the answer,
Gangsters ask answers not questions Because I was the question myself, and know.

I joined the drug dealers group at 16 years old, and I was one among those who brought marijuana in Kigali from Goma.

I lived in hell of sadness and ugly. Everyday fighting with other groups, hiding police and being hated by the society, which accused me to make their children’s bad.

Ha, I was the question God answered to the people, When I became a Christian at 19 years’ old. Man, it’s very hard to live in fear all day along In hard life where are no one superior care about
you, I used to smoke the herb, which revealed me to myself.

To get high and forget. We didn’t name it a drug but a leaf, When a leaf doesn’t work well, Sex without love was definitely the answer, Which was hollow and ridiculous too. I reached to the point
of being addicted, My life remained to be worse than before I didn’t even have models but critics.

My chance of change narrowed And lived but lost a hope The blessings I owned was the friends Especially my street mate Marine.

Other kids we grew up together, one of them their own extended families took them, others were in prisons or rehabilitation camps like Wawa and others died, and more of my sex partners leave to
rural, as you know the man are for the street and women for the bed, that’s phenomena we belong to… and more died mostly from HIV/AIDS, I seemed to be alone especially when Marine left,

he was the good I found and I praised him as my street brother and master, my life ruined until I met the other good and savior, Jesus Christ and now I praise him. Marine’s death was like the key
to my morning of change During the night, Marine left to club and leaved me in the Ghetto, sleeping with Aline This is how it goes;

at approximately 7:30, Sunday morning When I was removing my D*** in Aline’s hips The body of Marine was found in the old Garage.

The cause of death, is not yet determined Yeah, reports and rumors of any other cause of death Are speculative and unfounded.

I was losing my mind, and loss words ‘I’ll not comments further’ I pleaded “Except to say the mate in questions” Marine enjoyed the respect of our Ikundi And the admiration of our weed smoker,
student’s friends.

He will always be sorely missed That’s all I can say for now.

One of crowded people said; ‘Nirvana, may I ask you some questions?’

No, I won’t answer any questions I have no answers either. Oh, gosh, I can’t believe this.

I hope no one sees me crying or laughing, I hope marine soul goes straight to heaven. I thank all that nigga did for me or to me, I don’t have words for it. He used to make me feel smarter or
stupider than I am He used to praise and trash my poetry.

He thought I was innocent college not a street material, I had no clothes, no smarties From the first day of poetry slam at Goethe or Kigali Vibrate with poetry, Because of him, I was smart and

I might say, he was the one who {…} Oh, I can’t do this right now, I’ll have to come back later I don’t want to speak ill of the dead.

He’s the one wished me to change, and change the street kid’s mate life.

And all street ikundi, put their hope in me. He once told me; you’re a handsome street nigga like those home boys; Quiet Modest and Brave.

I made him proud of me and I do love him too Especially when he puts on smile and say; everyone be unique as I am Wherever he said that, he wished to change from his fake unique crimes, I love the
way he was too much funny, and he knew He once said; ‘I know I am louder than Arthur and MC P Wamamaye”

‘Vain and cowardly harsh drug user’ But what can I add on that?

in fact that made him a good friend to the world.

Oh man, learning about life is a pain taking task, But it has to be done with relish.

The street cross pastor once come where we were smoking and joined us.

We had a conversation, I remember He even told us that we’ll be nothing but a bum.

Marine asked him joking; ‘how our life will end pastor?’ And answered that we’ll ‘wind up in jail or dead’.

Our shut mind heard nothing but laughing stated Oh man, he was kidding us, gently of course everyone ends up dead.

Aw’ that’s not too bad. But when he was talking to us, We seemed just quiet and shy Oh, how stupid of me, I forgot I didn’t bring myself in this sick world, That’s why I asked for love in mine.

Pastor thought we was just quiet and shy Thought we was ready heard the holy words When in reality we were drunk and hung over Even if we fooled him, I heard a little And told my shut heart, “I
need that change”

Pastor used to read to me from the bible And assured me that my place in hell was all but reserved If only I could devote my life to God I immediately asked, ‘there would be Some small hope for my
salvation?’ He replied; ‘the gate is open; it is for you to enter’.

In that morning marine left me I thought too much, and thought on how my dreams will live on While I was philosophizing the life without marine I repeated his kinyarwanda name Gusenga [ to pray]
And thought about praying And remembered how the pastor said; ‘Your life can change through prayer’ And my heart insists; pray now.

I asked Aline to help me and pray ‘You say what?’ Aline asked ‘Help me’ Yeah ‘help me and pray’ ‘Pray for me’, I was using gestures of the losers And Aline said; ‘I’m proud of you Maggie’ That’s
how she used to call me.

“who is Aline?” she was the girl I loved her sex body when she was 17 while I was 18, She was a high school student, she loved me blindly and in acknowledge that I was nothing but a thug. I lied
her that I love her to fool her around and make her my sex machine, after she found that out, she never leaved me but showed me love I didn’t deserve, I used to spend more time with her, that’s the
time I feel comfortable ever. She acted as lover and mama After the morning of change, I paid a lot of her truly love to me, she’s now my fiancé and my baby mother, she is the world I own, the
happy world.

Aline started to pray and closed eyes Aline prayed a short pray “Lord Jesus ‘It’s true that we are sinners, we honestly Want to turn from all our sins, thank you for dying on the cross so that we
can be free from the punishment we deserve, I’m glad that you rose from’ the dead and are alive today please come into our life right now. thank you for healing our prayer, please now help us to
live the rest of our life in the power of your holy spirit, under your control. Amen”

in that morning we sang praises with gladness and bowed my head and worshiped, as usually sex goes with my happiness, that’s when we shared a baby. friends, sex without love is as hollow and
ridiculous as love without sex I thought a deep love to Aline, I’d never had before My happiness and thankful to God for changing me, I owe all to Aline pray. After that, I asked Aline ‘didn’t we
sin again?’ She replied ‘yes we did, but for a reason’ Which reason?

‘To change forever, this is the morning of change.’ She told me; ‘the most difficult is the decision to act, but a loving heart act the decisions’ Wow! I asked “so that’s why you didn’t given up on
me, and never cared how I harassed you? ‘YES‘ she said confidently “Because I truly love you my man, no matter what.”

From then my heart become weak and won And decided to give my right hand to Jesus and left hand to Aline to make sure that I am on the right Place, with right advisers and lovers. And then hugged
my Aline and she asked me; Luv, ‘can you do a favor to me and go with to church?’ Oh my God; my heart burned and questioned and asked babe, how people will think of me? I can’t. I’m not the one to
go to church, I’ll pray with you here home alone.

She looks straightly in my eyes and asked, so honey, ‘where will you find inspirers in your life?’ Believe me, ‘you need good friends to assure you that you real changed,’ will you find them from
where you were before? And told me, what they do think of me ‘to fall in love with pal like you’ while I born in Christian family? She continued “What they think of me when you take me in the night
clubs wore hire-hills and mini-skirts?”

“What they think of us when we are kissing in the street and took you from there drunk and smoking while my parents are sleeping?” “Think that all wrong things we did together, and image we have in
people minds especially me as a girl, Bae, think how my family think of me ‘to giving birth a babe with no marriage and how I closed my schools’ to follow you my love?” “Luv see; the real Christian
don’t think that God will love us because we are good but that God will make us good because he loves us.”

She pleaded “Please honey make me proud in my family and church, ‘rebuild my reputation my man.” From then I decided to building up my reputation and bring back my love reputation.

Good morning!

This is not just a greeting, but a hope that the beautiful morning can bring a smile on your face and happiness in your life. I love it when Aline say it to me, ‘my days will never suck again.’
RIPbMarine, “I’m going to pray today” I pretend I’m dead, I’m not afraid Aline will notice more than as I’m going to do it to you. If a man is thirst Let him come to me And let him drink Who
believes in me... God said.

From then I become a Christian, gospel songs rapper, poet and street preacher. I am about being a man, not violent man but a peaceful man, a man of society not against community, a man of
dignity,values and visions.

I quit smoking, drinking alcohols, I am new in Jesus Christ, I and Aline with our son have hope of a bright future. We live in love and happy family, I love my dearest all-time favorite person and
future wife ‘Aline’ My ‘madam and son’s mama’ and my only son, I myself, tomorrow Rwanda. Life is good.

The young man, a story above belong to, is now living in a normal life, he owns a small shop of furniture and art materials, with her fiancé Aline and their son, they live in the same good house
together, Aline is now a receptionist in one of big Hotel in Kigali city, when they are off at their work, they used to preach on the street, in order to let the good news of life be known with
other young or older people across the streets and organize different workshops where they provide the basic needs materials and health insurance to poor people across the street... Aline is
waiting to get back to school soon, and Nirvana is planning to widen his business and become a big entrepreneur, their young boy name is Byishimo [ happiness] means that they are now happy, he is a
quite handsome kid.

Turn down, step out and trust the bridge. ‘Love is the bridge’

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”

John 3:16. Jesus said “I have come that they may have life, an have it to the full.” From this and other places I read on the bible, I saw that it is God’s plan for us to have his life and to be
united with him forever. ‘Man and God are together.’

This answered my question “if that is what God wants, why is it that so many people are not experiencing that type of life?” Romans 3:23. “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.”

and in Romans 6:23 bible continues to tell us that, “the wages of sin are death.” By still reading the bible I found that, God created us so that we can live with him forever, but because we
inherit sin, we are separated from God, we then accidentally or deliberately commit sins, and these form a cloud between us and God’s laws and fall short of his standards- we are sinners by nature,
by practice and by choice.

Always between sins and holy there is a way, as God’s son putted on the cross between sin full man and holy one. Between them there are many things people experiencing, like Morality, good works,
sins, philosophy religion among others, many have tried to bridge the gap by variety of means -but all without success. by finding the solutions to my problems, the answer i get is ‘Jesus Christ.’

Look, God is together with man, as for me, I am fully myself when I love the other person, as the story above shows how Nirvana become real him when ‘he feels deep love to Aline’ Aline is full of
Goddess. because God created us in his image, that means; God’s in my neighbor face. we are loved and blessed to be created with Goddess, That’s why in romans 5:8. Bible said; but God demonstrates
his own love for us in this; while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

And once Jesus answered in; John 14:6 “I am the way and truth and the life, no-one comes to the father except through me.”

So what we couldn’t do- God did, by sending his son Jesus Christ, who was real God and real man, to die on a cross for all mankind. He “laid down his life” to become the bridge between God and us
and ‘God proved that the bridge, met his standards by raising Jesus Christ from the dead.’ Then if I cannot build the bridge why can I not choose to cross over the one that God provides?

There are two main steps I found repentance and faith Acts 3:19 ‘repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out.’ John 1:12 ‘yet all who received him, to those who believed in
his name, he gave the right to become children of God’ Is there any good reason why you should not do this now? May be you can ask yourself how, as Nirvana did but you need; • To admit your need-
“I am a sinner” • With God help turn from your sin • Believe that Jesus Christ died on the cross to save you.

For sure, God gives clear assurance of both forgiveness and the new life.

-1 John 1:9, ‘if we confess our sins, he is faithful and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.’ -1 john 5:11 and 12 ‘God has given internal life, and this life is in his
son, he who has the son has life; he who doesn’t have the son of God doesn’t have life.’

This is “I”

Cause when I was weary, worn and sad, Thirst one in the dark I laid down up on him I found in him a resting place, my thirst quenched, my Soul revived I found in him my star, my sun, my day became
bright. I’m the life of life, and He has made me glad I’ll walk till traveling day are done.

You should know this;

-sex is an act of worship, the altar must be prepared and must be acceptable in the acceptable environment, place, inspected blessed by priests and the government, for the glory of God. It must be
legal and official, if yours is illegal, stop it forthwith.

-smoking is bad thing, it shows that you don’t care about your own health, your loved ones and how you influence your children. Disadvantage of smoking are many but those of quitting are none.

NOTES ............................................................................................................... “Him proclaim, warning every one with all wisdom, that we may present everyone
mature in Christ. For this I toil, struggling with all his energy that he powerfully works within me.:” Colossians 1:28-29

“We are preaching hope, standing on the bones of the past” Bishop John Rucyahana

“The kids from the street don’t want preaching or messages. They want what they can identify with. They want to hear about the reality to their situation, not fairy tales. They don’t care if it’s
ugly; they just want reality.” EAZY-E

“I think we need to look at ourselves first. We should practice what we’re preaching, otherwise we are hypocrites.” MO IBRAHIM

“Effective preaching starts with loving the people we’re preaching to.” ADAM HAMILTON

“We lough and jest at what we call “street boys or area boys” instead of thinking of what we could do, to get them occupied or send them to school and create work opportunities for them. We rather
choose to build walls around our compounds, electrocuted fences to protect out interest and personal comfort. That only shows lack of personal responsibility” SUNDAY ADELAJA


I DEDICATE THIS; to all are doing their best to reduce these kids on the streets, you are really making the world better.

N.B: I Born as a Christian, but I believe that love is the bridge.

Table of Contents

life story

Submitted: March 09, 2018

From a street boy to Jesus seizure
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