There was a young man named Eric who I met by chance.
We became good friend and knew each other very well,
so well we knew what each other was thinking just by a glance.
Over time we became more alike, Brothers we would say
slowly over time he would be with me more and more each day.
But as chance would have it Eric was more than just a Brother,
he was someone I confided in and I began to love him like no other.
One day after school we met as usual and went to his room,
to play video games and waited for his Mom who would be home soon.
To my surprise he reached over and touched me in a peculiar way,
I wasn’t offended and it affirmed the desire and love in my heart that day.
For I had secretly fallen in love with Eric long before and wanted more
of that beautiful day when Eric would show his love behind closed doors.
It was his Mother who we both feared who would end our love,
for Eric was afraid of her knowing the truth and what would come.
Years went by and no one knew and our love for each other grew.
Then reality set in and Eric grew afraid, afraid of who knew.
He was scared of the choices and love for me that he had made.
He joined the Army to prove to himself and other’s he was a man,
just as I had done years before having the exact same plan.
But I had fooled no one including myself those days
for everyone that I knew had always known that I was gay.
Eric grew more distant till we stopped talking altogether,
In his mind it was his way of riding me and his secret even better.
I have not spoken to him now for a decade or more,
but I will never forget the love we had behind closed doors.
Eric will forever be my first and true love
for he was the only one that made my life fun.
Often at night I dream of the love we once had,
and each time I awake to reality and feel quite sad.
But all is not lost for I have hopes that in some way,
Eric and I will be friends again, some glorious day.
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