The first man I ever loved

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Poem by: MichaelS76

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Status: Finished | Genre: Gay and Lesbian | House: Booksie Classic

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A poem about my first true love and how much of an impact it had on my life even to this day. I hope he is doing well and I wish him the best. I am happy for him and for his wife and children even
if he thinks it's just a lie. I have always wanted him to be happy, with or without me and that's what I got, but it means being without the one I loves so much. Life is hard and love is one of the
most difficult and hurtful of emotions. That's what inspired me to write this poem about him and the love we once shared. He will always be a Brother to me regardless.

Submitted: May 05, 2015

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Submitted: May 05, 2015

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THE FIRST MAN I EVER LOVED

by Michael Dale Sipes Jr.

There once was a young man who I met by chance.

We became a good friend and knew each other very well,

So well he knew what I was thinking just by a glance.

Over time we became more alike, Brothers we would say.

Slowly over time, he would be with me each and every day.

But as chance would have it Eric was more than just a Brother,

he was someone I confided in and loved like no other.

One day after school we met as usual and went to his room,

watched TV waiting for his Mom who would be home soon.

To my surprise, he touched me in a peculiar way,

I wasn’t afraid and it affirmed the desire in my heart that day.

For I had secretly fallen in love with him long before,

A fire ignited inside of me as he too wanted more.

It was his Mother who we both feared who would end our love,

He was afraid of her knowing the truth and what would come.

Years went by and no one knew and our love for each grew.

Then reality set in and Eric grew afraid, afraid of who knew.

He tried to deny the love he had for me the best anyone can.

He joined the Army to prove that he was a man

just as I had done years before having the exact same plan.

But I was fooling no one including myself those days

for everyone that I knew already knew II was gay.

Eric grew more distant and we stopped talking altogether

In his mind, he was ridding me and his secret even better.

I have not spoken to him now for a decade or more

But I will never forget the love we had behind closed doors.

Eric will forever be my first true love and now that is done

but he is the one that for years made life so much fun

Each night I dream of the love we once had

And every day I awake to reality and feel rather sad.

But all is not lost for I have hopes that one day

Eric and I will be friends again, so each day I pray.

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synesthesia

Comment | 8 words

Sat, March 23rd, 2013 1:05pm

awe, really kinda sad, but also meaningful, awesome : )

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Comment | 80 words

Sun, March 24th, 2013 7:43am

Thank you for your kind words. I wrote that poem and the other The young boy who was like no other, from the heart. I did not have to think of the words, they just flowed out, so I guess that is the best kind of poem you can write. Thank you again and I am happy you enjoyed it. I hope you enjoy some of the other works I have submitted. Happy writing to you.

Michael Dale Sipes, Jr.