Dear Winifred; Feb. 8

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  No Houses
Advice (NOT good!) column

Submitted: February 08, 2014

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Submitted: February 08, 2014



Warning; advice given is NOT politically correct!

"Dear Winifred, I usually don't do this, but what do you think about my writing to The Car Dude; he sounds like an interesting guy, and I'm once again in the market for a husband.  I can't believe I'm thinking of being this bold.  Signed Available."

"Dear Available, I'd say 'asinine-pathetic', rather than bold.  You must be every bit as stupid as your bullshit letter implies.  I'd recommend against any involvement with The Car Dude; in fact, just to be safe, I'd wash my hands and wash my own mouth out with soap for even daring to utter his name.  He's a disgusting slime ball that I'm shocked was hired by my father-in-law.  I mean, he's so slimy, we have to squeegee the floor when he slithers by.  Winifred."

"Dear Winifred, what do you have against me?  Signed The Car Dude."

"Dear Car Dude, nothing; I don't get why you would think that--oh, if you'll excuse me?I don't mean to cut you off, but I just saw the janitor walk by with the squeegee."


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