Dear Winifred, July 29

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  No Houses
More sage advice from The Queen of Advice!

Submitted: July 29, 2014

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Submitted: July 29, 2014

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Dear Winifred, I'm writing to you today because I saw a shameful event take place yesterday, and I feel like I just have to get your opinion on it; my son plays baseball on a little league team, and yesterday an irate parent just wouldn't shut up, yelling that if his boy had he been allowed to play, he wouldn't have missed the grounder that cost the boys the game.  I felt terrible for the young man whose error allowed the winning run to score; he heard this 'gentleman' berating him at full bellow, and started crying.  He already felt worthless, and because of one overbearing loudmouth, felt even worse.  People, it's just a game; sure, it feels good when the boys win, but they're kids!  The object should be having fun, not winning at all costs.  What do you think Winifred?  Signed The True Meaning of Sports

 

Dear The True Meaning of Sports; I know the politically correct thing to do is agree with you, so I'll give the proper response; it's shameful and sad to watch a parent like this; making a fool out of themselves and embarrass their child, who shouldn't have added pressure to perform up to their father or mother's ridiculous and unrealistic expectations.  There, that's what you want me to say, isn't it?  Well, obviously you're not a gambling person, because if you were, you'd see that winning and beating the point spread is all that matters.  I realize it's just little league, but your little rodent needs to learn the hard truth from the day he or she laces up a pair of cleats; that soon it'll be more than little league, and we hardcore gamblers could give a shit if you had fun; we wagered big bucks on the outcome, and because of your boner, we're going to be unable to pay Guido, and we'll have to flee the state (not me, you understand, but I know a guy!)  So, little junior, maybe you'll keep that in mind the next time the outcome of a game is dependent on you; Winifred 

 


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