Oh, no, say it isn’t so, bro!
Over the intercom comes this demon-voice
Saying, “All students report to the gymnasium for
An assembly.” Assembly, my ass, it was Sophomore
Initiation Day; where juniors and seniors got to abuse
Us lowly sophomores. Already uncomfortable, and wishing
I was invisible, the last thing I wanted was any attention
Whatsoever being heaped on me. We filed into the gym,
And had to sit on the floor, while seniors sat on one
Side of the bleachers, and the juniors on the other,
And it was a madhouse. Almost immediately, the air
Was filled with flying stuff, as the juniors and seniors
Took out their lowly opinion of us sophomores, by hurling
Coins, other assorted aerodynamic items,
And eggs, lots of eggs. It was a school-sanctioned
Launching pad, and we sophomores were set up
As perfect targets. I just kept my head down as gravity
Brought embarrassment and projectiles reining from the skies
If I’d had a circular saw and a shovel, I’d have cut and
Dug my way right out of there, but it seems
I’d left those particular items in my locker; so the best
I could hope for was a quick ending to Sophomore Duck
Hunting Day. I’d almost survived, when something
Smacked me in the jaw; it was an egg; it stung, let me tell
You, but I wasn’t about to show it; looking back on it,
I was lucky it didn’t hit me in the eye. Anyway,
I managed to survive, somehow, with nothing else nailing me,
And we filed out of the gym; later, I found out that
My older friends knew who through the flying jelly-filled orb
That hit me in the face, but no one would tell me,
Which was lucky for me, because I would have been
Forced to never say anything to the thrower
Anyway, high school was off to a flying start, literally!
© Copyright 2017 Mike Stevens. All rights reserved.
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