"Springboard Shoes"

Status: Finished

"Springboard Shoes"

Status: Finished

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"Springboard Shoes"

Miscellaneous by: Mike Stevens

Genre: Humor

Houses:

Miscellaneous by: Mike Stevens

Details

Genre: Humor

Houses:

Summary

A fake ad for criminals' shoes!

Summary

A fake ad for criminals' shoes!

Content

Submitted: June 09, 2011

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Content

Submitted: June 09, 2011

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“Springboard Shoes”

Advertisement

 

“Has this ever happened to you?  You steal a car stereo, only to be apprehended by the police, simply because your ordinary shoes let them catch up to you.  If you’d purchased a pair of our new Springboard Shoes, instead of saving a negligible amount on those cheap-a**, ordinary shoes on sale, you’d be fencing that stereo, instead of carving your initials in the bleak gray walls of a prison cell.  At Springboard Shoe Company, we’ve built a rocket into the souls of each of our shoes, so you can easily out-run, and out-jump the authorities.  The police, unless they buy a like pair of our shoes (and we have a policy of only selling to criminals*), will be left in your dust.  So, whether you’re a drug-fiend, a small-time punk too lazy to get a real job, or both, we’ve got a super-shoe, especially for you.  Just come into any one of our brightly-lit, security-heavy (to prevent theft) stores and make sure to tell on of our saleswomen,

“Hey, show me your pair (of Springboard Shoes, of course!)”

 

*Show us your “I’m a Criminal!” I.D., and receive a two percent discount on your purchase of Springboard Shoes


© Copyright 2016 Mike Stevens. All rights reserved.

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