Waking Up in the Netherworld!

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  No Houses
Bleak reality!

Submitted: September 10, 2014

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Submitted: September 10, 2014



The T.V. shouts a warning, as my body slowly greets the day

I'd say "I", but my brain hit the snooze alarm

I look all around for the hot princess I was hitting on,

Before it dawns on me that I dreamed the whole thing

I should have known; an actual woman? 

I fell asleep with channel five casting flickering shadows

On the wall, and now I'm jolted awake by

Some dude telling me to seek medical attention

For an erection lasting four hours; whew, I'm safe!

"Coffee, coffee!" a stranger's voice screams in

The dark recesses of my brain.  "No shit!" I shout back,

As if I was verbal jousting with myself!

I need to get up, but see, that's going to be a problem,

Because my muscles feel like I've been drinking '-5 Hour Energy",

My gumption has left the building, and it 'aint coming back!

My muscles would be aching, if I had any

Salvation in liquid form is clear out in the kitchen,

And here I am, wrestling with my blankets,

Wallowing in a sea of fabric, no closer to

Actually rising; oh God, the pain! 

What I need is a block and pulley system hooked

Somehow to the ceiling, so I can hoist on a rope

And rise, but that would require arm strength,

And I just never have the strength to do

Anything about never having any strength,

So I'll resort to plan B; lay here and bitch!  






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