Third Party

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic
The second scene of a stage play about a Mother, Daughter and Father. They are beyond dysfunctional.

Submitted: February 05, 2010

A A A | A A A

Submitted: February 05, 2010



EMMA is sitting on a sofa staring into space. Her friend, TANYA comes into the room holding two cups of tea. She hands one to EMMA and sits next to her.
EMMA: It was embarrassing.
TANYA: I can imagine. It must have been very embarrassing. I can’t imagine my parents doing that.
EMMA: They’re not together though.
TANYA: And happier for it.
EMMA: I couldn’t believe they acted like that. I didn’t know what to do.
TANYA: I would have said something. If it had been me.
EMMA: You couldn’t possibly understand the situation though.
TANYA: No, I probably couldn’t.
EMMA: I mean, it must be a while since your parents went out for a meal.
TANYA: Both happier for it.
EMMA: I’m sure they are.
TANYA: I hope I don’t end up like them.
EMMA: I’m sure you won’t.
TANYA: My parents never used to argue in public like that. I don’t know where I would have looked.
EMMA: Used to just happen behind close doors.
TANYA: Yeah. They never wanted to make a show of themselves.
EMMA: Must be nicer in a way. Keeping their feelings bottled up. It must be better.
TANYA: They’re alright now. Both got new partners. Never argue in public.
EMMA: But behind closed doors?
TANYA: Don’t know. I’m not in that much to find out.
EMMA: You’re always in when I ring.
TANYA: Thats different. I always know when you’re going to ring. I always know what you’re ringing to talk about, but I go out after that.
EMMA: While I’m at home?
TANYA: Yeah. It’s not deliberate.
There is a knock at the door.
TANYA exits the stage.
EMMA takes a sip of her tea.
TANYA and IRVINE enter the stage. IRVINE’S nose is still bloody.
EMMA: Jesus.
IRVINE: I know it’s ridiculous. Your Mother did it.
IRVINE sits down.
TANYA: Would you like a tea Irvine? Two sugars isn’t it?
IRVINE smiles and nods. TANYA exits the stage.
EMMA: What the bloody hell are you doing here?
IRVINE: I couldn’t stay with your Mother. I wanted to make sure you were alright. I think you should apologise to your Mother.
EMMA: Apologise?
IRVINE: Some of the stuff you said. I know you didn’t mean it. You couldn’t be that vindictive to your Mother. It would upset me if you were. I wouldn’t like to think of you being vindictive to your Mother.
EMMA: I never said anything.
IRVINE: I’ll leave it up to you. I just don’t want you and your Mother to fall out.
EMMA: We won’t.
IRVINE: Because I feel guilty when you come to me.
EMMA: It’s fine.
IRVINE: It’s good that you have a shoulder to cry on.
EMMA: I know.
IRVINE: But I feel bad for your Mother you know?
TANYA comes back into the room. She hands IRVINE his tea.
IRVINE: Thank you.
TANYA: That’s alright Irvine.
She touches his hand as she walks past. She sits down next to EMMA.
TANYA: So I hear you had an argument with Mandy.
IRVINE: Yes I did.
TANYA: I was saying to Emma, I’m glad my parents were never like that.
IRVINE: Better out in the open.
TANYA: Not right in the open though surely. Not out in public.
IRVINE: What is the problem with that?
EMMA: It was embarrassing.
IRVINE: I thought you would be used to it by now.
EMMA: I am unfortunately.
IRVINE: It doesn’t matter does it?
EMMA: Course not. Why would it?
IRVINE: I think you find it amusing.
TANYA: Yeah I think she does as well.
EMMA: What?
IRVINE: And that’s your best friend who is saying that.
EMMA: Why are you here?
IRVINE: I came to pick you up.
EMMA: You’ve been drinking.
IRVINE: I wanted to walk you home.
EMMA: How did you know I would be here?
IRVINE: Where else would you go?
EMMA: Tanya is my best friend. I tell her everything.
IRVINE: You tell me everything.
There is a silence.
EMMA: I’m going home.
IRVINE: I’m going to finish my tea.
EMMA: Please.
TANYA: You go on your way. Let Irvine finish his tea.
EMMA: Please...Dad.
IRVINE: I’ll be home shortly.
EMMA rubs her face in her hands and exits the stage. IRVINE takes a long sip of his tea.
TANYA: I can top that up if you want.
IRVINE: No, I shouldn’t stay longer than I need to.
TANYA: It would only be a top up. Give me the tea.
IRVINE: I will finish it first and then I’ll let you know...had Emma been over here long? You weren’t in bed?
TANYA: No, she hadn’t been here long, but I was in bed. I was wrapped up all snug in my bed. It’s a good job my Dad didn’t hear.
IRVINE: I’m sorry she came over.
TANYA: She needed to have someone to talk to.
IRVINE: She normally talks to me.
TANYA: I can see why she would do that.
IRVINE: You can?
TANYA nods emphatically.
TANYA: I could never confide in my Dad like she does in you.
IRVINE: Thank you.
There is a silence.
TANYA: It’s a shame about you and Mandy.
IRIVNE: We’ll sort it.
TANYA: I like Mandy.
IRVINE: She’s alright.
TANYA smiles at IRVINE.
TANYA: How old do you think I look?
IRVINE: I’m sorry?
TANYA: People say I look a lot older than seventeen. I think I look older than seventeen. Do you think I look older than seventeen?
IRVINE: I thought you were eighteen.
TANYA laughs at this.
TANYA: No, people think I’m much older than that. I mean I assume they do.
TANYA: I work in an office at weekends. During the week I’m at college. Only sixth form college though. Anyway I work at this office in town and you want to see some of the looks I get from the men. These men are about your age I reckon. What are you? Forty-seven? Forty-eight?
IRVINE: Forty-three.
TANYA laughs
TANYA: I’m so sorry. I hope you didn’t think I was being rude. I wouldn’t want you to think that.
IRVINE: I don’t.
TANYA: My office. It’s full of these men. Little bit older than you. I can tell what they’re thinking when I walk past. I know they’re looking at me. I know that. Sometimes I like to play up to it. I can’t help it.
IRVINE: You can’t?
TANYA: No. It must just be something I give off. Some sort of sign. I’m not a deliberate tease. I mean I’m only seventeen aren’t I? On so many levels it is wrong.
IRVINE: Of course. I couldn’t deny that.
TANYA: I can’t help it can I?
IRVINE: Of course not.
TANYA: I know you wouldn’t act like them.
IRIVNE: Of course not.
TANYA: I didn’t think so.
IRVINE takes a sip of his tea.
TANYA: My boyfriend wouldn’t approve anyway.
IRVINE: Wouldn’t he?
TANYA: I wouldn’t care too much.
IRVINE: You wouldn’t?
TANYA: Why would I? He is gorgeous. He has a chiselled jaw. Beautiful eyes. Problem is, I am out of his league.
IRVINE: You are?
TANYA: Definitely. Sometimes I’m embarrassed to be seen with him. I imagine it sometimes like that for you with Mandy.
IRVINE: I’m sorry?
TANYA: You ever feel you are out of her league. Like you could have done much better?
IRVINE: Not really. Should I?
TANYA: Probably not much point now. You could’ve done.
IRVINE: Never thought about it.
TANYA: Must be difficult.
IRVINE: Not really.
TANYA: Eighteen year old daughter. Has her friends over all the time.
IRVINE: Only you really.
TANYA: Really. Oh that’s a shame.
IRVINE: You’re good company.
TANYA: Do you think? Oh I’m so glad you said that. I don’t whether you noticed, but I’m quite insecure. Very insecure in fact.
IRVINE: You are?
TANYA: Oh yes. That’s why I put on this front all the time. I may come across like I am extremely sure of myself. But I’m not.
IRVINE: It’s a convincing front.
TANYA: A lot of people have said that.
IRVINE: I can understand why.
TANYA: You don’t think I’m arrogant do you? I would hate for you to think that. I think we get on very well.
IRVINE: You do?
TANYA: Yeah, it’s like having another daughter isn’t it?
IRVINE: You think?
TANYA: Oh definitely.
There is a silence between them. IRVINE finishes off his tea.
TANYA: I can give you some more now can’t I?
IRVINE: I don’t think I should. It would be wrong.
TANYA: It’s only a cup of tea.
TANYA takes the teacup from him and exits the stage.
IRVINE, sitting on his hands, looks around the room. He notices a selection of washing hanging on the side. They are TANYA’S clothes. He gets up to walk over and have a look at them.
TANYA comes back into the room. IRVINE is immediately embarrassed. She stares at him and hands him the tea. She smiles. IRVINE takes a massive sip. He recoils and lets out a little scream.
TANYA: Sorry. It’s hot.
IRVINE puts the tea on the table.
TANYA: I’m so sorry. I hope this doesn’t make you think less of me.
IRVINE: Why would I think that?
TANYA: Here I am trying to act all adult. Tea in the night. What do I do? I go and burn your tongue.
IRVINE: It doesn’t matter.
TANYA: It does to me. Can I have a look?
IRVINE: Its alright.
IRVINE tries to pull away from her but she takes hold of his face.
TANYA: Come on, stick your tongue out...there’s a good boy.
TANYA smiles at this comment. IRVINE slowly sticks his tongue out. TANYA prods it.
TANYA: Yeah. Definitely burnt. Never mind. I’m sure it will be alright. It’s only tea. No need to go over the top.
IRVINE: Course not.
TANYA: I mean, you’re meant to be a man. You’re meant to be able to take this sort of thing. Not whine like some little girl.
IRVINE: I never did.
TANYA: I never said you did. If you did I would’ve have asked you to leave. It would’ve been embarrassing. Particularly for you.
IRVINE picks up his tea and takes another sip.
IRVINE: What if your Dad came down? What if he saw I was here?
TANYA: He would probably think you’re a dirty old man.
IRVINE: Would he?
TANYA: But I would explain to him that he was wrong.
IRVINE: You would?
TANYA: Yeah, I don’t think you’re a dirty old man.
IRVINE: Why would you?
TANYA: Exactly.
TANYA takes a sip of her tea.
TANYA: But you are still in my house.
IRVINE: You asked me to stay.
TANYA: Oh, you’re not outstaying you’re welcome. I was just saying it is late. Nothing else.
IRVINE: I can go if you want.
TANYA: That’s up to you...but I have just made you another cup of tea.
IRVINE: I’ll stay.
There is a silence between them.
TANYA: Why were you looking at my clothes?
IRVINE: I wasn’t.
TANYA: I’m not annoyed. I just wondered why you were over here. I’m not trying to make you feel awkward.
IRVINE: I take it these are your work clothes.
TANYA: They’re nice aren’t they?
TANYA takes a blouse from the side. She holds it in her hands and smells it.
TANYA: You feel this fabric?
TANYA takes the blouse and strokes it against IRVINE’S face.
TANYA: You feel how soft that is?
TANYA holds the blouse against her face. She hangs the blouse back up.
TANYA: You compare that to that rough old shirt you’re wearing.
IRVINE: There’s nothing wrong with it.
TANYA: True. It is just an ordinary shirt but then again my blouse is designed for something completely different.
TANYA: Yours is a cover-up.  You’re not the trimmest of men are you?
IRVINE: I’m sorry.
TANYA: I’m not being rude Irvine. I think I can be this honest because we are pretty close aren’t we? I can confide in you can’t I?
IRVINE: If you want.
TANYA: I think there is definitely a bond between us.
IRVINE: You do?
TANYA: Something about your age group. I’m just drawn to men like you. Must be something to do with my work.
IRVINE: You think?
TANYA: Definitely. I could never have an affair though.
IRVINE: You couldn’t?
TANYA: Not with those kinds of people. It’s more like a morbid fascination than an actual attraction.
IRVINE: Is this your insecurity?
TANYA laughs.
TANYA: Would you like to come to watch me at work?
TANYA: I can confide in you there. It’s difficult to do that here.
IRVINE: I don’t think I want to do that.
TANYA: I could wear that blouse if you like.
IRVINE: I don’t think I want you to.
TANYA: And you could wear your old, stained shirt.
IRVINE: I don’t think I want to do that.
TANYA: You could stand with all the others if you like.
IRVINE: I don’t think I could do that.
IRVINE picks up his tea and finishes it in one mouthful.
TANYA: I could get you some more if you like.
IRVINE: I’ve had enough.
TANYA: That’s a shame. I liked making you tea.
IRVINE: Maybe another time.
TANYA smiles.
TANYA: I doubt that very much.
IRVINE: Are you sure?
TANYA: Yes. I think it would be for the best.
IRVINE smiles at her.
TANYA: I hope you and Mandy work it out. I think you are suited to each other.
IRVINE: You do?....are you going to show me to the door?
TANYA smiles.
TANYA: You’re a big boy.
TANYA is about to leave.
TANYA: Goodbye.
She picks up the blouse as she goes.
TANYA exits the stage. IRVINE watches as she leaves

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