Lousy Unchanging Addict

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Non-Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic
I wrote this in 2008 about tweekers. I was close to one and it took a damaging toll on my psyche, as well as the enabling antics of my family.

Submitted: July 05, 2015

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Submitted: July 05, 2015




I have an observation about tweekers—particularly, well-off privileged ones who have a problematic view of body image. How about you parents out there stop letting them feel so privileged? They'll stop driving around as they please and won't be in the position to drive to a location just to score drugs. They won't be hanging around just to kiss their mom and dad's asses every single day, putting up a front like they're on the road to progress, meaning anything they say. They'll hopefully be working for their own money, working their asses off, I imagine, having no time for trashy boys (who are too old to act 15). Instead they'll meet (mostly) clean people who are the only ones they're around.

Rehab doesn't work, obviously. It appears they party and then go to rehab, like it's a mission to destroy the nose cartilage for a while and then cleanse. They depend on their parents' money and action to do something about it. It's so childish, it's like they do these drugs and feel guilty thinking about their family the whole time. The attitude of a rebellious child who still loves their mommy. And what's the reason they love their mommy? Because she's given them THINGS. Their parents laid out a foundation for them to be happy and have things that less fortunate people can't have. Crystal.

The way of thinking with drug addicts has the same jist as with food. You think you can eat a high calorie burger as long as you can depend on getting a gym membership later on. What that means is that you think to yourself 'I can afford to eat this burger. I'm not THAT fat, so a few extra junk-calories aren't going to hurt me.' Then you get carried away... You overeat some days, eat junk food every day. You think 'No, I shouldn't eat that' (but eat it knowing inside that you just WANT to.) Eventually you hit the too-far-gone mark you've been building up to. Junk food way too often makes you a junk food junkie.

From my observations being an ex-smoker and a spectator of drug users (thanks to those druggies close to me) and a recovering substance abuser myself, they must think they can do any hard drugs they choose. They don't see what it does to them or have much of anyone discouraging them, so all they have is the voices in their heads telling them, 'I'm perfectly fine. I can afford to snort this/smoke this/inject this.' Sadly, it's probably the same "voices" that make them schizophrenic. Oh—by the way, that's from screwing up their brains with drugs. They justify doing drugs to themselves by thinking they can just QUIT LATER. It's always put off with addiction. It never officially has an end.

With the knowledge of eating disorders and the knowledge that some of these people never exercise and lose weight the correct way, it's obvious that speed is used as a method of weight loss. I know that the feeling of hunger makes me feel skinnier, and I know that some people out there starve themselves and get a sense of satisfaction and accomplishment because of it. When you're on speed, aware that you haven't eaten for 24 hours or more, there's no doubt you feel accomplished and better about yourself, but for all the wrong reasons. Someone who would die happy as long as they were skinny is completely missing the point.

A proper method of weight loss would probably keep them off of that, because they would be thin already and have no need for the drug. They could also do with smart, intelligent friends who in no way lean towards the intention of doing drugs. Losing their cars and losing their parents' endless trust would do them good. They obviously don't appreciate it. Don't give in to the lies! They put up a front. Behind your backs, they're doing ALL the same nonsense.

It starts with that car. Just think. Isn't this the person you would warn your kids away from on the streets? They are already FRIENDS with the creeps people are warned to stay away from. Walking to a job a short distance away or taking the bus wherever they need to go isn't going to introduce them to any situations worse than what they've already been through. So before getting all "protective parent" towards a tweeker, remember there's nothing bad about taking their car away. That's why their druggie boyfriends don't have cars—from their parents, no less. Save it for when they stay off drugs for over a year and not the pathetic 3 months or however long sobriety and rehab lasts.

I read an article where a blunt, vulgar guy told a drug addict, "Go ahead and die a junkie. Rehab doesn't work. Save it for the people who actually AREN'T lost causes. All people do there is talk about the fun times and compare who did worse drugs, like a big junkie convent. They never get out and stay clean." Think about it. People who weren't too far ahead of themselves go to rehab and stay clean.

Once an addict, always an addict.

Sad but true.

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