Dealing with it

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
Yip, i am still trying to deal with this issue in my life!!

Submitted: December 20, 2008

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Submitted: December 20, 2008

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I thought that I was dealing with it
Getting my head wrapped around
I thought that eventually
I was getting rid of the ties that bound
 
I believed that I was moving past it
That I could cope each day
Then we had that discussion
And things changed in every possible way
 
Maybe I had wanted to believe
Or was it because that is what I was told
That the feelings between the two of you
Was nothing, meant nothing, could be sold
 
And so that is what I used
As my means of getting stronger
It meant that the days between tears
Were getting longer and longer
 

And then you confessed to me

That what you felt for him, you were actually in love

And that not only is that the way you felt

But the way you feel still, in love

 
You are in love with a man
That was never yours to love
It was not harmless admiration
But so much more, way and above
 
And now the dilemma that I face
Is that since you told me your story
I feel your actions were premeditated
That you basked in his glory
 
You woke up one morning
And decided to set your sites
On winning over someone, my husband
Forgetting your friends’ plight
 
You wanted him, needed him
No matter what the cost
Did you even consider me?
What all I could have lost?
 
At one point in the healing process
I had believed I missed you as a friend
But after hearing how you feel, still
To hell I want you to send
 
If you truly felt sorry
For what it is you have done
Would you not have come to your senses?
Turned around and run
 
Instead you have decided
That you love him still
Do you realise what that does to me
That I look at you and want to kill
 
You are a traitor
A Judas of the worst kind
I hope that you leave me alone
And that misery you will find
 
For I cannot wish any good
On a person who pretends to be someone they are not
You are not a good person
Those ingredients fell out the pot
 
You cannot expect to be in love
With your best friends husband
And think it is going to be ok
For that I will not stand
 
I will not accept that you are sorry
For I do not believe you really are that
If you truly felt remorse
This would never have happened, neither would that
 
I have such an ache in my head
And a deep rooted pain in my heart
I want this time to be over
So that I can make a fresh start
 
 
 
 
 


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