You have to go

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
This is a way of dealing with the pain I am going through

Submitted: November 02, 2008

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Submitted: November 02, 2008

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I sometimes wish that I could scream
That I could tell you how I feel
That I could say whats on my mind
So that I can begin to heal
 
I feel like the emotions
Are welling up inside
That they are consuming my every thought
I fear I can no longer hide
 
I feel that you have a right to know
How insanely hurt I am
How you have betrayed me
In the worst way you can
 
And you know what gets to me the most
That you have not said a word
That you have not even felt
That this small gesture I deserved
 
You have not given an inkling
Of whether you feel sorry or not
Whether you understand the serevrity
Of this little boiling pot
 
Do you realise that you created this monster
And that it is here to stay
That with every phonecall and sms
I more badly want you to go away
 
I so badly wish that you would leave us
So that I can get on with my life
For I feel that you are always an issue
As I strive to be a better wife
 
I know that I have the upper hand
Because I ended up with him and not you
But that doesn’t mean I don’t question
Everything that you do
 
It s like we have gone from 0 – 100
In the matter of a blink of an eye
You went from being my best friend
To trying to steal my guy
 
Do you know that I could never
Look at you the same again
That every thought I have about you
Causes me more pain
 
 And yet you carry on with life
Like it was yesterday
Like nothing ever happened
Like there is nothing there to say
 
Well I am dissapoionted
In your character or lack thereof
Or am i? Has this not shown me
What the future could have been made of?
 
Every time you phone him
Every time I hear he is speaking to you
My skin begins to crawl
And I feel like I am going a bit coo coo
 
I want you to leave us
So that I can begin to move on
I want you to leave us
To stop playing the same hurtful song
 
I want you to leave us
So that time can begin to heal
Because as long as you are with us
The reminder is constantly real
 
So I cannot let go and trust
For you plant the seeds of doubt
With every trip to his office
And every phonecall out
 
Do you understand this
That you just have to go
So that I can get my life back
And allow the trust to grow
 
 


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