Shattered Love

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Non-Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic

The other side of friendship. The feelings beyond the togetherness. And the battle between mind and a heart.



The light was chased by its shadow. It was jailed in the core of ebony. Meanwhile, a drop was softly falling. Its raindrops were weeping as they fall now hardly.

“Enough! I told you to stop ruling me. Would you please listen to me sometimes? Could I get a pi-e-c-e . . . even a little piece of trust from you?”

“But I have done what makes me happy. Please understand me. This kind of what I felt is strange yet made me comfortable. It’s nice to be with this.”

“It’s not permanent and you know that! It only gives you pleasure from the start b-u-t . . . how about in the end? I’m exhausted feeling you crumbling, dying inside. Let me handle these things,” as his mind seemed over power his lowly heart. Try to save him from being naive.

His eyes became heavy like a sack of rice. Tired is his mouth talking with no one. His mind keeps convincing while he grunts nonchalantly. His lungs expanded as he inhales and sighs the heavy burdens he carry-vanish-carry for so long. Turn the lights off!

The rain abated the moment the light escaped from a decade of imprisonment. He stood and peek at the window as his mind let him do. He saw two hummingbirds doing something. Then, his brows seemed to meet. He grins and grins remembering something but nothing. The birds in his sight are just simply standing in a black wrinkled, brittle branch of a guava tree, waiting for him to behold the rising of gleam, a gleam of his endless beginning.

“Ken . . . Ken . . . comes down here! It’s almost eight o’clock, hurry up and fix your things afterward,” as his mother shouted from the kitchen preparing for their breakfast.

“Alright ma!” as he responded.

He opens the glass window, clearing the sky-blue satin curtains. The sun rays flooded in his baby blue, spacious room as it enters. He fixed and cleaned his messy bed – folding, arranging his soft white heavy bed sheet and two vast pillows. He put his black pair of socks carrying a foul odor and his vans blue shoes in a shoe rack. He placed his cluttered used clothes to an empty basket.

He walks reluctantly downstairs like carrying the world while catching his breath. He made several steps until he’s on the table in the kitchen sitting on a narra-made chair.

His mother sat as she placed the thick pot holder to her side. She ate sitting in her favorite chair fronting him. She looked groom in her ponytail hair while pink and yellow brightened her blouse that fitted to her slim body figure. She used to wear shorts every morning that made her younger amidst in forty years of age.

Ken heard nothing except the clattering of forks and spoons. No one’s talking like their mouths were both sealed.

“What’s wrong Ken,” as his mother finally broke the silence.

“Hmm . . . Ma,” as he scooped a single spoon to his mouth, “I’m not in the mood to go to school now.”

“Ken but why? You alright? Are you sick?” she said with anxiety in her eyes. It’s your Foundation Day today. And Faye, your best friend will be joining a pageant. Right? You’ll not go to cheer her?”

“I’m fine Ma.  I . . . I’ll go Ma,” he answered as she threw him a convincing look.

He took a shower hastily. His blue checkered polo fitted to his firm, matured body. With black skinny pants and his favorite vans blue shoes. He stared to the full length of mirror that suits his 5’6’’ height and combs his sticky black hair with a gel. He loves to wear all of these things every time it’s washed day.

Everyone’s excited – walking and fixing as he passed them. Amidst each business, he placed his presence like an empty cup in their gymnasium, the right side of the main gate of their school campus. The gymnasium looked isolated, crammed with noiseless. He was saturnine upon sitting, waiting for the pageant. The white monoblock chairs were in a disordered position in his sight inside. Each side has wooden, durable bleachers keeping the gymnasium its slight dimness. The stage was full of decorations: ribbons, colorful foils, artificial flowers and letterings that were jumbled.

His eyes wandering – wondering it was almost 5:30 in the afternoon. He’s waiting. Pretending! Waiting! He stand-sat-stand on his chair. He’s tired. He kept watching the main door but nothing was entering except the night gradually crawling. The light and dark were stretching like playing tug-of-war.

Upon the cold wind cooing like a dove, it took the initiative to clean the untidy gymnasium – sweeping the candy wrappers, empty disposable cups, cellophane of junk foods and buntings.

A moment later, a tap had astonished him.

“Hey, why are you still here? You must go home now. It’s almost late. Perhaps your parents are now looking for you,” as a fat security guard in a complete neat uniform of their school, Mabini National High School said in a deep voice.

“Alright Sir,” he answered.

Absolutely, he came home late. As he squeezed the knob and push the door, his eyes caught his mother lying in a mint green couch while the TV still turning on, showing her favorite teleserye “The Legal Wife”. As he placed his bag on the couch, his actions made his mother awake from her heavy dream.

“Hey, Ken! Why are you late? Have you eaten?” his mother said in concern while rubbing her eyes to clear her sight.

“Not yet Ma,” he replied in a low voice.

“Go to the kitchen, I’ve prepared there your food.”

“Alright, thanks Ma!”

He took his supper like a mouse. Slight eating because he lost his appetite. He took a half bath and head off to bed.

*  *  *  *  *  *  *

Roosters were crowing, it echoing in his eardrum. It had always been his waking up call.

He was up and got his uniform. His clean white polo uniform paired with black slacks suited to him. Leather shoes on his feet and a blue vans bag on his back.

(Burp) He was full after taking his always requested meal.

“Here’s your allowance Ken,” as his mother handed him a P50.

“Thanks, Mama”, as he took her still soft right hand and place it on his forehead,

“I’ll go now Ma,” as she continues sweeping the floor.

His mother became a housewife after giving birth to him. Ken was her only child. Her husband, John Jimenez loves her so much and don’t want to exhaust her if she seeks for a job. She can give Ken what he wanted thru his dad’s pension. His father died way back ten years ago. It was a tragic event in their life ever since as earthquake in magnitude 7.5 quavered them. Their hometown after then, Mabini ComVal suffers from catastrophe and craving for recovery. He was trapped inside their house while his father saved his mother in an open area. John runs toward him. When Ken caressed the light outside, his father was hit by the heavy, sharp falling debris. His prowess and bravery deserved to be called as SPO4 of PNP but unfortunately, his warm breath abandoned him and became cold as it fled.

*  *  *  *  *  *  *

He passed the hallway on their campus, as he entered the main gate,

“She’s so perfect yesterday.”

“Yeah… it’s Faye Reyes, right?”

“Yeah, you’re right. She’s so beautiful like a lotus blossoming in the pond. She deserved the crown.”

He heard the compliments by the students that crossed him as he paid attention to them. She’s tall, a girl with delicate features with a hazel nut-blond bangs. And it’s one of the reasons why he befriended her and be with her. Faye was so popular now on the campus.

As Ken entered to their room next to the room of Faye, a relaxing voice that soothes to his hearing caught his attention.

“Hey Best, I’m here!” his best friend shouted as she waved her right hand.

He smiles gradually as he walks towards her swiftly. He hugged her.

“Congrats Best,” he said.

“Why were you not here yesterday,” she said in a pout with lip gloss lips.

“I was here Best b-u-t . . . “, as he explained, “But I was late because I thought it will be going to start at exactly 4:00 in the afternoon. If you only know, until what time I waited for so long,” as he made an alibi.

“It’s okay, I understand Best! I forgave you,” she said as her classmates pulled here to go somewhere.

“Really? Thank you so much Best,” he said happily but his voice seemed a whisper to her ears as she departed.

Kriiiiing…! Kriiiiing…! Kriiiiing…!

It was 10:00 in the late morning.

“Class dismissed!” as our math teacher screamed in the class.

Ken had an assignment that needs to be done in the library because of plenty references there. As he scanned the physics books and lowered it from his sight, his eyes caught Faye sitting while chit-chatting with her friends mostly boys in the straight line from him in a distant. He closed the book immediately and stamped it hardly on the table. He was out.

The day crept into noon. The lion of his stomach is now roaring.

Ken took his lunch alone in their canteen. Amidst the number of students who also ate there, he paused, letting the volcano erupt upon looking to Faye in a distant. Her hair was dancing rhymed with the wind as she scooped and talked with the same company. His orange juice in a cup was fell. His lunch somewhat did not satisfy him.  He grabbed his bag.

*  *  *  *  *  *  *

Reading in the mini-forest of their campus is his pastime. The fresh wind was playing while the vigorous Mahogany trees were dancing. He sat on the roots of that tree while reading a novel. The trees formed such a dense of a canopy that all beneath was a deep of pine-needles and the leaves were now hitting the ground.

Upon reading, Faye’s knocked and entered in his mind. He reminisced the time that they both used to unwind here. He remembered her contagious laughs, sweet smirks, and her gleam teeth. Also, how she hurt his stomach every time she cracked a joke. He craves now her presence. But pinches him she was out of his lonely eyes and touch.

As he turned the pages and looked in a distant his face dropped. Faye was there also in the same trees sitting with a boy that he didn’t recognize in the upper-right side of the forest from him. A boy in a red polo shirt and black pants sat beside her. As he saw them, the boy is like sunbeams that penetrate his eyes.

The boy was gone and became a dot in his view after giving something to Faye. Faye continued to enjoy the melody of her favorite songs that made her relax through earphones upon holding something.

Ken’s right foot was forcedly moved, made a step like moving alone without his command. Several steps more he could smell the stunning scent of Faye.

“Hey Best, it’s you! You alright?” she said beaming like a fireball.

He shook his head to be normal from somewhat hypnotizing, “Hi Best – I’m fine!”

He made a slight cough, “What’s inside that pink small box you’re holding?

“I don’t know Best. I didn’t open it yet,” she replied as she tucked a strand of her hair behind her right ear.

He beholds her, from her glittering pink sandals up to the top while Faye is busy opening that box. His eyes widen as she wears the gold necklace with a heart pendant.

“Who’s that? Where’s that come from? Where’s my necklace that I gave to you Best?” he said in a sharp tone. She took a moment to answer.

“A-h-mm . . . That’s what I want to open with you Best that’s why I’m so pleased to see you now,” she replied in low voice.

“Now, tell me Best where is it?”

“Hmm . . . Be-s-t“

“What? Could you please tell me immediately where the silver necklace that has a key pendant is?”

“Alright! Alright! Best --- I lost it. Sorry!

“W-h-aaat? Huh, a sorry? That’s it? You are happy now replacing the necklace that I gave you?” he said while shrugging his hands.

“It was during my pageant Best. It’s not my intention to lose it. I was out of myself that time because I was so nervous,” she defended with forming tears in her eyes.

“Unbelievable Faye!” he shouted. “If you really value me, you will take care of it! It’s my gift for you during our 5th anniversary of friendship. I valued so much our togetherness Faye, our memories – You! And now we’re fourth-year high school and seem you first started shattering, throwing how far our friendship is now.”

She tried to collect his thoughts while silent as a stone.

“I didn’t know you now,” he said in a heavy voice. “You know what I was not really late during your pageant. I came early here in school that supposedly I’ll not. But my Mama, Theresa, convinced me to cheer you. I took alone my lunch and excited to see you. But I used to be late because my mind wanted too.

“But why Best?” she sobs.

“Because I don’t want to see your saintly face as you ramp yourself while wearing undying charisma and fascinating aura. You know why? Huh!,” he said to her as he stands using his knee closer to her. “I don’t want to form again the love for you that I was once hammered.”

She stares at him quickly, zooming in her eyes.

“Every time you accompany with someone else mainly the boys on our campus that was admiring your magnificence, my heart was squeezing like extracting the blood from it,” he added.


His eyes are crowded with tears. He turned back, slapped his forehead – controlling his tears not to glide.

“Yes Faye!” he answered as his eyes squinted and shaded. “Perhaps if you’ll know, you’ll reject it. Your admirers became the center of your attention while I as your best friend always left alone.”

“I’m so sorry Ken,” she said speechlessly and didn’t know what she will be going to say as she placed her right hand on her lips with so much shock. “B-u-t . . . but I have a boyfriend now Ken,” as she admitted. “We’re two years and three months now. He’s here earlier.

His book that was close fell at sunset. It takes his soul. It darkens his world. He was as ‘tabula rasa'. It’s all stealing away from him. The whisper of the wind became monotonous- was lonely like grieving with him while the sun rays reflecting its light to the green leaves of each branch of Mahogany trees.

He took his book speedily and stamping his feet in the crystal-like sand of the forest as she stops him from leaving her. They were the only person there in the forest that time. She cries over him like a falls. Her right-hand tries to reach him as she fell on the ground craving for his sorry. As he made quite a lot of steps, departing from her, he halts and stole a languid last glance to her. Then, he turns his head and walks more while regaining his balance. She bellowed but it became a murmur in his earshot in a far-off.

*  *  *  *  *  *  *

“Dinner Ken?” as his mother invited him. “I cooked your favorite adobong manok.”

“Later Ma,” he said in a raspy voice as he walked unconsciously upstairs to his room. His mother tries to figure it out what was happening to her son that for the first time he rejected his always requested meal. He wasn’t sure how he felt after leaving Faye. The crickets’ noises give life to his lifeless room while it floats in darkness. All he could do after closing his door was to lean against it while tried to regain his equilibrium. He lay in his bed sullenly like lying in a coffin without changing his clothes yet.

“You’ve done what is right. Thank you for trusting me.”

“She looks poor. I pity to her.”

“But she devastated you. It’s good not to build again your love for her. Perhaps she’s not for you. There are thousands, millions, billions of girls that deserved for you – in perfect time. Move on! It’s just an experience, an experience that will make you matured,” as his mind confronted his heart not as rancorous unlike before.

“Thank you for being my eye-opener. I owed you so much,” as his heart extending its gratitude to his mind.

His heavy eyes and weary mind drove him to a sweet a dream.


*  *  *  *  *  *  *

The cocks’ crow wakes the sun and slaps him.

The cold breeze cuddled – as wind puffing him, rising like he doesn’t carry anymore the world. Reformat as a computer was him. Ken opened the glass windows and clearing the sky-blue satin curtains. The sun rays pecking on his cheeks while hummingbirds sipping the sweet nectar of a bright-pink gumamela flower and chirping placidly.

“Ken, hurry up I have prepared your clothes here,” his mother said.

“Here, used these nike yellow shoes for the meantime because I’ve washed your vans blue shoes yesterday and it’s still wet.

“But Ma . . . where is it?” he said with a frown face.

“Just for now, Ken - outside!” as she responded.

Ken took it rapidly, carrying it slight wet. He used to wear this every time they go to church. It’s his mother’s gift to him on his 14th birthday, now he’s fifteen. It’s one of the things that remind him that his mother was with him all along.

The first mass is 8:00 in the morning. It was still 7:30. His mother and Ken were walking as their exercise along in the Quezon St. towards the Sto. Niño Parish. Upon reaching her shoulder and all he can see is her midsection, he gazed at her unfading beauty in and out, “Thanks Ma, for everything and giving me my all.”

“You always welcome my dear Ken,” she replied smiling while she took a quick rub to her son’s hair.

As they passed the park that has carabao grass, the dew moistened the tips of his mother’s toes through her brown MSE sandals.

“Ohh . . . o-h-h Ken,” she said while stamping her feet cutely in his sight try to rid off the wet. He couldn’t help her but smile.

“New beginnings are often disguised as painful endings as Lao Tzu uttered. There comes a time when you have to stop crossing oceans for people who won’t even jump a puddle for you but going in one more round when you don’t think you can, that’s what makes all the difference in your life,” as Father Alex Adaya emphasize his divine homily.

He nodded while the message echoing in his ears and sank on his mind. They rose as they ought to give their ‘peace sign’ to each one. The church was filled with the different follower of good deeds and those who crave for forgiveness. He hugged his mom and she kissed him on his forehead that made him minimal awkward. As he tilts his head to the right side, his eyes were nailed. It took a moment for him or for that girl to say. Despite his brows’ quarrel, all he could do is to slight smile and bow as she also did.


Submitted: March 28, 2017

© Copyright 2022 Mr. Keating. All rights reserved.

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