Some Other Place

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic
This is a goodbye.

Submitted: June 13, 2015

A A A | A A A

Submitted: June 13, 2015



Before you start to read what’s written below, please open a separate tab, go to Youtube, and search for ‘Some Other Place - Arcade Fire’, and play it whilst reading.

When you married me you made the already happiest man on the planet, also the luckiest and gave him something that he never thought he’d have, someone to share his experiences with. Not only did you give me a person in which I can confide in, and trust with each of my weird habits, strange secrets and even my strangest fetishes, but you became my soulmate and I can never thank you enough for that. Those first few months we didn’t move much, we went to Paris on our honeymoon and decided to stay there, right there, in our beds overlooking the river. We drank wine, and ate very little so to be fair we were probably tipsy quite a lot of the time, but it doesn’t stop me from knowing that in that moment I didn’t want anything to change. You call me on my mistakes, kick me up the arse when I start to think too much of myself, and pick me up when I’m forever down. You make me feel like the type of person that everyone should aspire to be.

But things have changed as they always do. It’s not like that with us anymore. I still look at you in the same loving way, melting whenever I allow my tainted eyes to gaze upon your flawless being. Still hold you like I always have, like I never want you to leave and that if I let go it’s almost as if i’m scared that you’ll slip through my fingers like sand and I’ll look around to find you and realise that you were never really there. I still look at you longing for you to even want me a little bit, just like you used to, but you never do. You never look at me like I’m something that you really want to keep hold of. You aren’t scared that I’ll slip away and it will be like we’ve never had anything because you know how strong the hold you have over me is.This isn’t healthy for either of us anymore, we might have been able to smoke away our bad days when we were younger, under the pier down at the beach, or in the back of your car, but those days are over. We don’t have the luxury of being able to escape. These are our lives and we’re playing with each others emotions too much for either of us to be truly happy. Yes we have good days, and sometimes it feels like those good days are worth holding everything together for, but then at other moments it makes me feel that much more empty inside. That I’m living for our good days now, hoping that another will come some day soon, whereas before everyday was a good day.

I’m about to do something that you never would expect me to do. I’m leaving you. I’m walking away before one of us gets irreversibly broken and the other has to live with that guilt on their shoulders forever. I don’t know whose fault it is that I’m leaving I just know that I can’t be a companion to your life anymore. I was living the happiest I ever have before in my life in those early days, but now it’s been five years and you don’t love me anymore. I don’t know where I’ll end up, but maybe you’ll find yourself there too one day, and if that is the case please try and find me, because then I’m sure nothing will tear us apart.

Goodbye my love.

A short story by Faber.

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