READ ME! Letter to Allie

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: True Confessions  |  House: Booksie Classic
Pouring my heart and soul out in a letter to my girlfriend

Submitted: October 02, 2015

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Submitted: October 02, 2015

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Allie My Love,

This is a letter to you that I wrote while you were gone away at the Banner Behavioral Hospital. I want you to know first of all that I do and always will love you even on the days that I forget to be nice and even if you don’t believe it sometimes. I love you so much and miss you so so so so so so so so so so much. I don’t want you to harm yourself in any way shape or form his includes physical harm and negative comments because and I will explain this see it would feel like you are hurting a part of me as well because I believe that since we are so close our 2 souls have morphed into 1 or joined together in some way like that of a set of twins or maybe even more so. Or I guess I could be crazy. I think some couples like jess and Matthew fail to reach this same level of love for each other. Even though we have had our ups and downs and our share of domestic violence toward each other I think I blame that on immaturity, hormones and the learning curve at the start of building a real relationship. I think we are past most or all of that and together we are stronger. I have no idea if you agree with all of this but… isn’t it obvious “WE” have become such a “WE” that everyone refers to us as a pair. I know what you are thinking that is called codependence. However I believe it is something much deeper I felt this strong magnetic pull to you from the moment I met you I never could understand it and even tried to deny it. Haven’t you noticed our strengths and weaknesses seem to compliment one another and make up for each other’s. See now that you are gone at this place I get a small glimpse of what life is like without you since I cannot text, call or see you very often and since I am dumb/dramatic and writing this to you on the first night you are at the new facility. I feel as though you may be lonely and sad too. However I don’t know if this is true. But whatever I will get to my point anyways my life is… yes could possibly maybe probably very small chance be livable without you (ya don’t read that) but see the thing is my life would be dull and meaningless without you and see that is just something I can’t bear to think of and makes me very sad. This is why sometimes I have issues with clinginess and space giving and I am sorry for that. Also I just really want you to be happy and seeing you cry the other night just about killed me inside. Look I feel like my life finally began when I met you. I’m not really sure what that other crap in my early years was just filler I guess to pass the time until I met you. Yah it did make me feel like an asshole for tattle telling on you for trying to kill yourself but I would do it again and again because I care so much about you and you I believe are an extension of myself and just as I have quit harming myself for your sake I would expect you and I will continue to try to stop you from harming yourself. I hope you understand and forgive me and still love me.

Love You Always & Forever

Veronica

 


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