Codfish

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
Children decide to take drastic action concerning the horrid Portuguese dish traditionally served at family Sunday lunches.

Submitted: January 28, 2014

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Submitted: January 28, 2014

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Father knocked on the dark wooden door twice before ringing the doorbell, as it was the custom for all of the Pinheiro de Melo family. Mother was wearing that beautiful green dress, reserved for such family occasions. Sister wore that childish red dress with white knee socks. And Carol, of course, wore that stupid plaid skirt Mother had picked for her, with that white shirt that had that annoying collar. Stupid pigtails hung from her head, so tight that made her eyebrows go up a little. Who Mother thought she was? At the age of twelve, one should be able to wear whatever they choose. What was wrong with the Pikachu shirt? But to top it off, Mother was unusually inspired by her evil motherness, and picked out earrings. Pearl. "What. The. Hell", Carol thought as she heard the soft footsteps that belonged to her Grandma. She could already smell the cod. Her wish for Grandma to forget someone was at the door was in vain, bacause the doorknob turned slightly to the right, then slightly to the left, and the door was open.

Grandma's fragile figure stood there, smiling. She was about as tall as Carol was, which was not tall at all. Skinny and pale, she widened her grin and hugged her grandchildren. Carol held her breath when those scrawny arms surrounded her, the hands carrying the scent of the abominable lunch that awaited in a very well-known glass tray, somewhere in the tiny kitchen. Grandma was all smiles and invited them to come in. Auntie and her husband, Uncle 2, were already there, with Cousin 1, Cousin 2 and Cousin 3. Uncle 1 was the only one missing, but Carol knew he wouldn't bother to come. Like her, he didn't like codfish. Unlike him, she was not an adult, and and that meant she could not just drive to a random restaurant whenever she wanted.

There was nothing she could do, so Carol grabbed her sister by the hand and dragged her to the study, where Cousins 1,2 and 3 were waiting for them. Cousin 1 was uselessy trying to mantain a stable internet connection, Cousin 2 was building something with ancient wooden blocks, and Cousin 3 was searching something in the weird dresser that stood in the corner. She was probably looking for a pair of pants, because her girly yellow dress was simply a shame for anyone that was Carol's follower. However, when she saw Carol wearing the stupid skirt, she seemed to breath with a little more ease. Cousin 2 looked at them and grinned. He knew her Mother had got her. He was also wearing clothes that would never get close to his skin if it weren't for maternal interference. However, they didn't even have time to talk properly, for Grandma clapped her hands a few times and called everyone to the table. Before they could go, Carol had the brightest of ideas.

"When they leave us in the kitchen, we wait. Then, as soon as we can, we get rid of the 'bacalhoada'!"

Sister and Cousins barely had the time to absorb the idea. Grandma was already calling them to the kitchen, where the kids ate. The dinner table in the fancy room was only for the adults. 

The five sat on their respecive chairs around the small rounded glass-topped table. The smell was sickening, and Cousin 3 looked like she was about to barf her guts out at any moment. Grandma and Auntie filled their plates with the white corpses, the onions, potatoes and olives inpregnated with the unbearable stench. The glasses were filled with a little wine and water, but not for Cousin 3, for she was too young. She got grape juice. The two adult supervisors left for their table, and, as soon as they did so, Carol stood up with her plate and walked towards the trash can.

"What are you doing? They will see it whenever they want to throw anything out!"

Those wise words came out of Cousin 1's mouth. It was true, as soon as they came to the kitchen, they would at least notice the garbage overflowing. Then, sudden, the idea came to Cousin 2:

"The window!"

Carol now walked proudly to the window, with her cousins imitating her. Together, they all threw the disgusting Portuguese dish to its second death, and heard the beautiful "plosh" it made when it reached the end of the six floors. 

The adults didn't notice that the children got almost twice as much dessert as usual. It didn't matter, it was a holiday, and the Porto wine bottle was at its end. Carol, Sister and Cousins exchanged victorious glances at the end of the family reunion, satisfied with the day. Father said goodbye and Mother smiled to everyone. Carol and Sister left, and the fresh air of the night was wonderful, with no hint of cod. But as soon as they reached the car, the disgusting  perfume reached their nostrils, and it wasn't from the tray Mother carried, for it was closed tight. Something was fishy. And that something was Father's car, covered in Portuguese tradition.

 

PORTUGUESE VERSION: http://semprealeatorio.blogspot.com/2011/08/bacalhau.html


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