A Compilation Of Words I Hate Myself For

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Young Adult  |  House: Booksie Classic
This is just a compilation of all the things I've written while happy/sad/drunk/on ambien

Don't try to understand them, just feel what they make you feel

I refer to "him" in a lot of these, but "him" is a pronoun I used for multiple different guys at different times in my life

Reading the summaries before the chapters might help understand them a little better

There'll be more posted someday

If anyone even reads these

Table of Contents

A Compilation

Submitted: November 09, 2013

This is just a compilation of all the things I've written while happy/sad/drunk/on ambien Read Chapter

The Universe has Decreed

Submitted: November 09, 2013

“I long to fold myself against you until our ribs interlock; our breathing becomes one. I long to braid flowers into your hair, Dan... Read Chapter

The Yellowing Notes

Submitted: November 09, 2013

My mind is a yellow room filled with half learned sheet music and the faces of people I loved. If you take the time to shuffle through ... Read Chapter


Submitted: November 09, 2013

You wouldn’t understand; with the warmth of another’s body still upon your chest. Affection is so foreign I cringe at the wind when i... Read Chapter

If Rhymes Carried Weight You'd Be Dead

Submitted: November 09, 2013

It’s not just the weather. I need you now more than ever. My body’s rebelling against me. Curling itself against me. The weight of mi... Read Chapter

Anything I wanted to Describe

Submitted: November 09, 2013

He comes for me at midnight. I’ll climb from my window with a rope made of sheets. Helmet on, we’ll blindingly fly through the city. ... Read Chapter


Submitted: November 09, 2013

I wanted to touch you more than you could have ever felt. I longed to trace the pale blue maps which veins have shown through skin. These... Read Chapter


Submitted: November 09, 2013

We are such odd creatures, truth be told. What is it within us that stirs the desire to be close to another? Not only in physical closene... Read Chapter


Submitted: November 09, 2013

I close my eyes and listen to the soft melody of the rain. I drift away to that place where I’m with you. the last place we were togeth... Read Chapter


Submitted: November 09, 2013

If your soul was a book bound in leather, I swear I’d read it a thousand times over. I would crease it’s pages, marking my favorite s... Read Chapter


Submitted: November 09, 2013

It would be as simple as light filtering through sheer curtains. As easy as two glasses in the sink rather than one. An arm sleepily thro... Read Chapter


Submitted: November 09, 2013

In the dark of the night I long to go to a place where you are. With a cabin in a field and trees surrounding that. Where windflowers gro... Read Chapter


Submitted: November 09, 2013

My love for a man has tragically fallen to its death, beating against the rocks below. Unable to be gathered up and protected from this h... Read Chapter


Submitted: November 09, 2013

My muse is beautiful, lyrical even. He is as a song to my ears, the rain that slides through my hair and falls off of my eyelashes. I see... Read Chapter


Submitted: November 09, 2013

To have a beautiful moment in the rain with you. While it pours violently around us, I would tell you sweetly all of the things I’ve he... Read Chapter

There Are No Words

Submitted: November 09, 2013

My hands shake when I write, and I think that I might be dying, and my head is pounding from the exertion spent trying to not break down ... Read Chapter


Submitted: November 09, 2013

Each morning when the sun rises, my immediate longing is for that millisecond when the sun will be extinguished in the place of the night... Read Chapter

Chicago 1992

Submitted: November 09, 2013

I never lack the things to say but the people I say them to don’t ever appreciate or even comprehend how much they mean to me and how b... Read Chapter

Help Me

Submitted: November 09, 2013

Late at night when no one can hear me I restlessly tear the Sheets over my face and hide From the sadness which Is threatening to... Read Chapter


Submitted: November 09, 2013

I never liked the smell of cigarettes but you look so bright leaning against your silver car I almost think I’ll wander over and let th... Read Chapter


Submitted: November 09, 2013

And I’ve worn your sweater every night. I’ve completely given up the idea of letting you go. But my heart still hurts and I just want... Read Chapter


Submitted: November 09, 2013

And if I knew I only had 30 minutes left to live, I’d spend them finding you. And once I did, I would kiss you to make up for all of th... Read Chapter

High School

Submitted: November 09, 2013

Dear, I adore you. Lets meet in the hallway before lunched and make a run for it. Forget about her, and classes and grades, and lets ju... Read Chapter

November 9, 2012

Submitted: November 09, 2013

Salt spray on bare skin is one of the most enjoyable feelings in the world. No man can recreate the sun on ones shoulder, the freckles th... Read Chapter

Maybe Its Best If I Hate You

Submitted: November 09, 2013

Some say they can see the sun in the eyes of the one they love. But as for me, I see the moon. The deep pools of envious gold which I cap... Read Chapter