Losing Your Reason to Live

Ever missed someone to the point of suicide?
Begged to know them again,
To feel their words brush softly against your skin,
Their healing touch compatible with the beat of your heart?

Ever missed someone to the point of suicide?
Felt unworthy of the happy memories you once shared,
But desired to live them again?
Felt guilty for the ones that ended the smiles,
That ended the conversations,
That struck the final words into your heart like piercing daggers?
“We’re like a bomb just waiting to go off,”
He said, “We’ll be the death of eachother, Love or not.”
Now I’m forgotten, a part of a past he’ll never look back upon....
And like that, all was lost...
Yet I miss him so damn much...

Ever mised someone to the point of suicide?
Best friends for fucking ever,
Lovers till the end....
They were all promises that we soon forgot.
I only wish I could live in his mind again,
To be his breath just as much as he is mine...

Ever missed someone to the point of suicide?
Id cry, but the tears just don’t surface....
They’re blocked by the locked chambers of my heart,
Numb to the touch as they miss his soothing words.

Ever missed someone to the point of suicide?
He had once healed me, I thought.
But all he did was hide the pained part of my being,
Until we were lost and it returned..
A broken part of my being that will always reside within me.
If only i was dead,
If only I could TRULY be gone,
I told him I couldn’t live without him....
I still feel it true.

Ever missed someone to the point of suicide?
He was the movement of my dance...
The moment of my song...
The cause of my creation...
He gave me significance...
And yet now it’s lost.

Ever missed someone to the point of suicide?
We still talk,
But not in words...
We still greet,
But not in meaning...
I miss the moments we did,
When every second counted...
But in the future when he has his new wife and kids,
I will be forgotten.
I will be dead.
I will be me.

Ever missed someone to the brink of your final, dying words?
...I still Love you...