Things That Annoy Me: Feminism

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic

Women are great, don't get me wrong. But every now and then, one springs up where I ask myself 'Where do you get these ideas from?!'

I get enough feminism shoved down my throat in almost every text we study at university. Phallic this, patriarchal oppression that. After three years of being on this course one question has to be asked. What about masculinism? Well, aside from that fact that it doesn't roll off the toungue quite as well, it simply doesn't exist. But what I'm going to write in this article is a case for masculinism. But unlike feminism, I am not going to go right ahead and say, in lamens terms, 'Women are awful people', as is vice versa for feminism it seems. My point of view for masculinism is going to try and take the moral high ground. I'm not going to insist that we men are oppressed or un-equal to the opposite sex socially or culturally. There will be no hostility here. 'But feminism doesn't employ hostility at all', you might say. Well, as I said in my rant about racism, anything that one is passionate about, one can just as easily be enraged should anyone contradict it. My example of this case of hostility bit back at me time and time again on Facebook, when I posted what I originally thought was a harmless and quirky status update.

Here is what I posted:

dear beautiful woman in the gym: sorry if you caught me looking at your wonderous body time and time again. I don't mean to be such a pervert but I couldn't help it. When you look that good and wear a top that low cut you have to expect these things to happen. You know full well that this will happen when you wear things like that so if you don't like to be the center of attention in a public place do try to be less alluring to the eye next time

The focus of this status was not to reach out to the world saying 'hey look at me I'm a pervert', as some of the enraged comments insisted. It was simply a comment on our society and how women complain or give us dirty looks when they catch us admiring them. They are getting angry about simple biology. I look at a beatiful woman because she is pleasing to the eye and she releases a few hormones in my brain that make me feel a little more at peace or a little happier. That is the chemistry of attraction. Although this chemistry seems to be increasingly annoying to women. The first two comments I recieved were 'You're such a bellend, it's not her fault you're such a pervert' and 'I can't believe I'm reading this, she has a right to wear what she wants without being sexually objectified by perverts'. As I'm sure you can imagine the next forty two comments that sprung up were from both feminists and masculinists. The feminists all insisted that we are disgusting perverts taking away the right for a girl to wear what she wants and the masculinists all insisted that wearing such revealing clothes will inevitably lead to men looking.

A few other girls came on to advise me that 'as a general rule, girls don't like to perved on', but all these girls for all their social and patronising wisdom, had failed to see the focus of the status in the first place. Instead, they saw the word 'pervert' and believed it ample reason to set up a black and white battlefield on my Facebook page.

I tried time and time again to explain how, if a girl wears a low cut top and is particularly attractive, men are going to look whether the woman in question believes in wearing what she wants or not. Just as it is inevitable to fall asleep and then wake up in the morning, men will look. Of course I had a few people who were understanding who said the same and tried to back me up. But it wasnt enough in the tidal wave of feminism. There was so much hatred that had sprung up from these girls beliefs that I was really shocked and even a little hurt.

I was a little hurt because I had originally thought these girls to be my freinds but some of the cutting remarks they left were not the kind of things freinds say to each other. Prior to this little incident I had heard that they were speaking about me behind my back about how 'creepy and pervy' I am. And I know why they think that. It is becuase whenever we go on a night out or anywhere special, like a gentlemen, I say to them 'You look lovely tonight'. Which is, what I thought, the kind of comment they seek in the first place by putting so much effort into their appearence. With this attitude that these comments are 'creepy' already in their minds, I had set up a perfect playing field for them to snap back and display their feminist attitudes that they somehow feel need to be voiced at the slightest opportunity. As a matter of fact, one of these girls in particular, I used to be really good freinds with. We spent entire days together without a flicker of annoyance. All it took for her to hate me with a burning passion was the fact that I didn't come to her leaving dinner, prior to going abroad. Now, after two years of great freindship, she scolds me and sends spiteful comments whenever she see's it to be slightly appropriate. Such stubborness makes me sad, but it is also this stubborness that brought me to realise, I could never get her back as a freind and she will always hate me for one little incident. 

Anyway, I digress. Back to topic at hand. Masculinism, in my mind is a school of thought that argues for men who try to be nice and get it all thrown back at them ungratefully. From this incident, I have learned to be extremely careful what women I compliment as, now, I am unsure if they will go back to their freinds and gossip about this 'creep' who displayed an iota of politeness. The gentlemenly ways have dissipated not becuase us men, but partly because of women who simply don't allow us to be. Try being overly polite to a girl, the next chance you get. Hold a door open for her and let her pass through first, hold her tightly when walking down the street and going past and unpredictable drunk,or even tell her how nice she looks today. You'll get a funny look because she, in her institionalised feminist ways, will think the only reason you are doing these things is to get in her pants. Not only is this a self flattering state of mind but it leads perfectly nice guys like myself to think 'Why bother?'. And so men spiral downwards into a confused state of mind asking the perpetual question 'What do women want?'. Well, feminism has gone from stregth to stregth and has empowered women alot. What women want, from this frame of mind, is different to what they wanted thirty years ago. So we still have to figure it out and we can't defer to our elders because their wisdom is old news.

Masculinism is also subject to all the unspoken rules of attraction. We men have to play mind games with women to figure out what to do right in  or leading up to a relationship. Every girl has a different kind of set of values on how she should be approached by a man and we have to figure these values out through the most minisicule clues found in body language or something as petty as how many x's are on the end of a text. Ladies we are not psychic. So when we think we have figured out the puzzle you have presented us, and make a move, more often than not it is the wrong move and we are left feeling utterly inadiquate and confused. 'Stop your whining and man up' you may say.

But feminist ideals have given you the power to whine and comlain about lack of equality to your heart's content. So what's wrong with us having the same power? 

Submitted: February 16, 2012

© Copyright 2022 Nick Banks. All rights reserved.

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Add Your Comments:


Amanda Siddall

For someone who does give men dirty looks when i see them looking you think i would say, we should be able to dress skimpy and men shoudnt gawp. I do believe in femisim and we are not here for you to look at. But on the otherhand i do agree men will look at women if they are pleasing to the eye. If a women wears a dress men will more then likely look at their legs. I guess that is just the way it has been and will be. And some women can take compliments. Friends who brand you creepy and pervy are really not worth the borther by the way a (:

Fri, July 6th, 2012 7:43pm


Well, exactly, I don't associate with them any more. They just made me less miserable. I have less friends now but I don't regret it because the ones that are left are one worth spending time with. Thanks for the read :)

Sat, July 7th, 2012 4:55am

LE. Berry

Have you ever noticed that a young woman first glances at what is between a young mans legs? It's the BEST part about him, the penis making all men the same. It's beautiful and a source of life. But who needs to look at his retarded and stupid ugly face.

Sat, June 24th, 2017 1:59am

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