Middle School Adventures

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Young Adult  |  House: Booksie Classic
Just a story of when I was in middle school.

Submitted: March 22, 2015

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Submitted: March 22, 2015

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i hate my life, not a single day goes by that i dont think about suicide.
i got myself here, no one else did. i honestly believe i will never be 
anything, it pains me to think this way but i do. i never thought id give
in to whatever my dad says or what society says, but i have. i go to school
just to please my dad, my grades are bad because of how many days ive missed
school...but its all my fault, no one else's. i dont think i can do this anymore
i just want to be somebody...but ill never be anyone. i remember where it all began
back in 6th grade when i was being bullied by crowds of people, like 40 kids all calling
me a faggot or that im gay because i chose to have long hair back then. during the summer
my mom made me dye my hair blonde, it looked good until i started school. the first week
everyone liked me because i guess i was "cute," but days passed...i got a haircut and it was 
bad. my hair was short and everyone called me a dork because it was bad, no one wanted anything
to do with me..i found new friends, true friends. later that year my hair grew out
and it was two shades, blonde and brunette. people made so much fun of me, i would never
fit in because i was different. i was american. the only people i can remember as being my 
real friends were 3 people, moustafa , martino , and nazly. they were kind
hearted people, i was a loser but they chose to be my friend despite the image they attracted
from people being around me. i was bullied a lot during that year, i couldnt go a single day
without being called a faggot or gay, im not homosexual. i have to write about this experience
because i believe i was traumatized for this. 6th grade was truly hell, but i do miss it.
besides the fact i got bullied everyday i was my true self, i didnt hide behind a mirage. 
there are so many memories good and bad that i wish i could write down, but i believe there
is not enough space. my life has changed though, for better or worse. moustafa and martino 
were good hearted people. martino taught me how to use a computer which enabled me to meet
everyone i know now...im socially awkward so the computer gives me something to talk about
and make friends. moustafa was another story. he was a good friend, my best at the time, 
we never really hung out when it came to after school meet ups, but we did ride atvs once
which will ever be a memory in my mind because it was so much fun. the one thing i never really
got out of the 3 friends i had was nazly, she had it all..beauty, smarts, and popularity. i never
knew why she hung out with me, but i liked her at that time. i knew her for a year but i believed
that i did at one time love her. when i moved to america after 6th grade my friends and i grew distant
i dont talk to moustafa or martino at all anymore, i do see nazly once or twice on facebook every once
in a while, but never actually say anything. i still like her, but i know for certain it will never
be anything more than that. 


i forgot to mention 5th grade, it was a small part of my life but it will show up later in it..only with
my friends though. i guess i was popular in 5th grade, or something like that, i had a lot of friends
but my grades were still bad, but teachers usually helped me get them up. ill never forget that year
it was the year i wish i could repeat over and over again, so i can hear this girl's soft and tender voice
her name was logan, she was on my bus, i knew she didnt like me but i tried to get her day after day. 
i never asked her out because i was too young to understand relationships or anything. anyways, back then
i had so many friends...zach, nathan, zackie(i think thats how you spell it), another zach, and sophia..
those are the few i remember. we were really good friends, at least thats what i thought. zach and logan
rode my bus, everyday was amazing and i loved school only for the bus rides, because i got to see logan
and make her laugh. her laugh was enough to make any man happy. one distinct thing that could make her
laugh was when i pretended i was in a low rider and said "my pimp car" which was surprising, she laughed
only when i did it...to this day im sure she was laughing at me, not with me. i remember one guy, morgan
i forgot to mention he was one of my best friends back then, and still was for a long time until he moved
and we grew apart. zach was also a really good friend, i would go over to his house like once a week
and we would play around with his R/C helicopters or legos. those were the good days, when i still was
so happy and loved life. the day after school ended my parents told me we were going to egypt the next
day which led to 6th grade.


7th grade was the year of change, true change. it was the first day of school, i remember it like it was
yesterday, i just got to the bus stop and the driver took my name, address, and phone number. once i got
to walk down the bus aisle i look and spot logan and zach, i thought we would still be friends..apparently 
not. zach shakes his head at me as if he is disappointed. logan looks at me for a splot second and looks
away as if i were a ghost. i see morgan towards the back of the bus and an old neighbor nick, nick motions
to come sit with him but i barely know him so i sit with morgan, morgan was a true friend, he didnt want 
anything from me, not money, or popularity. i was confused at the time so i ask morgan what happened to 
everyone, he doesnt know. i lost my old friends with no explanation of why, i regret going to egypt til 
this day, i miss logan, and zach. id never go to zach's house or hear logan's laugh again. i was torn,
i decided as soon as i got to school i wasnt going to try to get attached to any girls. but it wasnt
that easy. 7th grade was the start of my current life, i met my first friends in 7th grade, roy, 
scott, nathan, and noah. they were all kind hearted, we joked around a lot. my grades were still bad 
in 7th grade, until i was diagnosed with ADHD, which was the downfall in my social life. i was prescribed
medication which made me focus, it also made me very antisocial.

 

ps. this story isnt finished or edited, i wrote this without any grammar, punctuation, or spelling edits...forgive the tons of errors. you can still read it (:


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