I grew up in the sicks of the south of England with my father and three younger sisters. In the year 1927, when I was 19 year olda man waited with my father in the court yard to meet me. That was the year my life changed. He was a hansom man, Mr Dawson but he wore his suit rather thinly, like a child in her mothers shoes it didn’t fit. I smiled, I dare say laughed inside, but as comical as it was my father frowned with disappointment. He took my hand in his and told me of my future as it should be as Mrs Dawson.
I feared my father. His suit fitted like a man in armour and I daren’t speak back. It was always as he'd wanted it.
The engagement which I was not looking forward to, was agreed that afternoon. I look back now and I think what a waste of a life, what a waste! For marriage is as corrupt as a pack of cards, you can’t just pick the Ace of diamonds the cards are dealt one by one from anothers hand. I was forever getting the joker!
I was afraid for myself and my future and I confinded in Alice. There was a moment at the party whenshe removed her silk glove from her hand just so she could wipe my cheek with the back of it. Nobody noticed those small gestures, and of course getting away with small touches leads you to believe you will get away with bigger ones. It was foolish of us, but it could not be helped.
On our third meeting; roast dinner provided of course by the hands of my fathers cooks one Sunday evening, Alice and I left the table unnoticed. We stood just at the top of the stair where we could watch people leave, most of them incoherent from the red wine.
Alice told me my fathers wine had indeed had an effect on her too, and that her eye’s would not see past me. I’d laughed heavily as she attempted to walk in a straight line and of course she could not! She slipped her hand into mine “Oh dear I shall not be seen dead like this Ann, what for these heels!” she managed between cackling and reached downto her white shoes totook them off. She threw them aside whilst leaning into me for support, suddeny a little shorter than I.
Green pearls drew closer… wanted flesh tasted the hot air around my lips before taking them fully, touching my heart with the tip of her tongue. A kiss so full it bruised even my toes! She kissed every inch of me that night until my skin turned purple.
I loved her from the moment I first saw her.
I haven’t seen Alice for 37 years. Today I recieved notice for her to attend her brothers funeral tomorrow.
Well I think my father will turn in his grave to know I am, his home made wine sent him there at an earlier than expected and now nor he or my husband can stop me from seeing her.
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