Into the cold night

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic
girl's sad thoughts in the night.

Submitted: January 12, 2008

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Submitted: January 12, 2008

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Into the cold night i am freezing into my tent, feeling so confused and angry. I waited for him so long into the dark, and it was getting colder and colder, but Alex just told me:
„Sorry, I am tired. We can talk tomorrow.”
But it was my fault too. Why was I so stupid? Yes, I wanted to be just, I let my friend John to go first. Now i am trying so hard to calm myself. I am telling myself:
„But you was just and it’s the most important.” But they are words without sence.
Alex tent is next to mine. I hear everything, that he tells. It seems he is walking around now. It’s the one of my reasons, why i can’t sleep. I think all the time, that Alex don’t sleep. Maybe it’s just dog, which is walking around. Whathever! It can’t calm me.
Now I am thinking about tonight. It started good. We all went to the river to swim. A stream was very fast and I almost drowned. The place, where we are is so beautiful-here is a river and forest around us. We are on a little mountain. We were singing and dancing. One boy, who came to us tonight looked like my acquaintance and i thought, who he is. We good spent time, it was funny. But then came the night. Everybody went to bed, but some people stayed. I stayed, because Alex did it. There stayed my best friend Louise too. She talked to Alex very long time. They sat near the river. So romantic! What did they talk? About what? I walked around and saw them. I felt jealousy, but my wish to be with him was stronger than this, than all things. Louise came back. She cried. I felt sad for her and thought, that something bad is happened. Some people went to the river and made a noise. I embraced Louise and asked, why does she cry. She told me, that nothing bad happened, she just felt this way, she just wanted to cry.
„Why do you shiver?” Louise asked me.
„Really? It’s because of this cold night.” I answered.
„Strange. You are dressed in two cardigans. I have to feel cold, but i don’t.” Louise told me and we sat, embracing each other. I told her:
„I want to find Alex. Do you know, where he is?”
„Maybe he is to the river.”
„Go there!” I said, and we went to search him. He wasn’t there.
„Maybe he sleeps,” I said.
„I think, that no. Where is his tent?” Louise asked me.
„Next to mine,” I answered and went to my tent. No, he didn’t sleep.
„I will wait for him, when he will come here. Will you stay with me, Louise?”
„Of corse! I would stay even if you would go to your tent.”
„Thank you!” I said, but Louise wrote a message.
„Give it to Alex,” she told me.
„Okay,” I said and thought:
„What is written in her message? I can’t say, how I want to read it! But I can’t, because she could see it. It wouldn’t be good to read it. It’s her life.”
Alex came. I gave him Louise’s message and said:
„It’s Louise’s.”
„Do you want something?” he asked me.
„Yes, I want to talk with you!”
„Come with me!” he said and led me.
„No, wait! My friend said me, that he waits for you.” I said. My friend John told us:
„No, you can go.”
„Go you first!” I said.
„Ok,” he told me and go. I waited again and again, but just felt colder and colder. I was a fool, i made a mistake. The darkest hour into the darkest night with the darkest thoughts in my head. He said, he is tired and i walked away. Why? I could stay here with him, i could be persistent, but I was a fool. Again. I couldn’t sleep, i went out. He was away. I was alone, i am still alone! Here I am-crying and thinking about what could be!


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