Let He Who Is Without Heart Cast The First Stone

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic

A fun spin on breakup and heartbreak.

Let He Who Is Without Heart Cast The First Stone

I once knew a girl who I gifted my heart,
she was pretty and witty and ever so smart.
When we were together t'was like modern art,
but one day she said that she had to depart.
Needless to say, she broke us apart,
she 'lost' her key and then broke my heart.
What a clumsy tart.


Submitted: August 26, 2007

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Comments

air

cute! almost reminds me of a nursery rhyme :)

Sun, August 26th, 2007 2:42am

Author
Reply

Hah, thanks.
Pretty much straight after I posted this I realised I didn't really like it, can't put my finger on it but it's just not that good tbh.
Thanks for the read/comment though.
x

Sun, August 26th, 2007 6:53am

orynnfireheart

Very humorous and light-hearted. Great job...keep up the good work.

Sun, August 26th, 2007 4:14am

Author
Reply

Thanks alot, 'very humorous and light-hearted' is what I was going for I guess ...
x

Sun, August 26th, 2007 6:54am

leesah

lol...I like the first line 'I once knew a girl who I gifted my heart'...fun stuff

Sun, August 26th, 2007 11:19pm

Author
Reply

Why thank you, I too liked that line, certainly better than the rest ... hah.
x

Sun, August 26th, 2007 6:58pm

foldingover

I love the title, good choice. Excellent job!

Fri, August 31st, 2007 9:07pm

Author
Reply

Hah, why thank you, I always liked the title =)
x

Fri, August 31st, 2007 3:21pm

EdwardJBradleySr

November:

Liked this. Given the rhyming scheme, using the word "art", you might be able to expand this into something really funny. Not at all delicate but funny.

Happy trails,

Ed Bradley.

Tue, September 18th, 2007 3:02am

Author
Reply

Why thank you very much, I might well do that =)
x

Wed, September 19th, 2007 4:42pm

xxemoxbfsxx

it was funny and good. makes you relise (SP) poetry isn't always about seriousness. lol.
peace out.____xxemoxbfsxx_____

Tue, January 1st, 2008 8:10pm

Author
Reply

Absolutely.
Besides, who REALLY wants to be serious anyway?
x

Tue, January 1st, 2008 4:03pm

Myrenda

Wow, this made me smile and laugh. Great job.

Tue, January 15th, 2008 4:40am

Author
Reply

Thanks =)
Laughter is the best medicine
x

Tue, January 15th, 2008 4:08pm

lilypad1

I know just how you feel!
I don't really see the light heartedness of this...it's quite emotive I would have thought.

Fri, February 1st, 2008 12:49am

Author
Reply

Really? To be honest, I can never really feel that much emotion in this at all, I always think of it as a fleeting thought and a 'pfft, what's the point of caring about that old mess? It's over' if you know what I mean ...
x

Thu, January 31st, 2008 6:53pm

Maple Bowen

Good rhyming! It's very difficult to rhyme in poetry, but you sure pulled it off! =)
~Maple

Wed, July 9th, 2008 5:09am

Author
Reply

Cheers
x

Mon, July 28th, 2008 4:57am

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