Dear Diary : My Love Story

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic
This is my story. Sorry if my English is bad because I used Google Translate :D

Submitted: November 07, 2011

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Submitted: November 07, 2011

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Dear, diary...

Somehow memories in my junior high school is too hard to forget. I remember every detail of the events I have ever experienced in the junior high school. Except one, that is how I can be close with him. Everything happen just like that, naturally, flowing like water. I just followed the flow of water, the flow wherever it took me, even I did not expect when the flow makes me feel close to him, until I love him.

At seventh grade, we were classmates. Initially, we often argue, mock one another. Then, we often share a cheat sheet during a test. Not only when daily tests, even during last semester. Not just once but repeatedly. When my friend said the possibility that if I liked it, I insisted evasive. \"We're just friends\" that's what I always say every time my friend asked about it.

When we go up grade to eighth grade, we became classmates again. We're getting closer. Since then, I started to feel weird. I feel my heart will be 'burned' if I see her with her ??friends. But, I always calm down and told myself that 'I was his friend. No more than that. I just like his female friends'. I became more frequent daydreaming, writing lyrics on the table using a waterproof pen. Starting from Taylor Swift, Lady Antebellum, all the lyrics that I remember. Not only that, I also write poems short sweet and left a lasting impression for me. Surely as he approached, would I delete all these poems and act casual.

And he would ask me what I just wrote? He will force me to let him read the writing which I think is very embarrassing that I have to hide it even tear it if necessary. Although I feel pity to tear a poem I made ??for myself, but there are no regrets from my heart. I even feel happy because with that silly poetry, he became close to me.

Behind all the excitement, there's always sadness. The sadness came when I heard if he already has a girlfriend. And I just found out about it later, when other people have heard the news. It was like lightning in the afternoon to grab a big tree near me and crushed me. I could not laugh, and could not cry, but my heart is so sore.

He is acting normal, even very familiar to me. But with his usual attitude, I was confused to respond to his attitude. Sometimes, my heart was so crowded because of the excitement. But on the one hand, I could feel the pain is so deep.

I am minded to yell, \"Do you know if I like you?\", But I do not have the courage to do so. I wish he knew the true feelings, whether he would return my feelings?

Once upon a time, because of my ignorance, I say I love you in a foreign language ever taught by a friend. He forced me to say it means, but I never say what it means. I was too embarrassed to admit that I have done folly by sending the message.

Now, we've never met again. He continued his upper secondary school level at a school outside the city. While I continued levels of high school not far from home. I do not know what he had found the meaning of the word which I sent at that time. But now all I want is to bury these feelings deep as possible in my heart, and forget about it although will not be easy to forget because of all the sweet memories he left behind.


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