EmotiBytes

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An Epoch Making Invention To Facilitate Communication In The New World Order

Submitted: November 20, 2007

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Submitted: November 20, 2007

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In one of my article named Brain Drain, I had mentioned how people react differently to different situations. Since I am also belong this group, I am not different. The reason I am writing this is because I am reacting to a grave situation which world is facing currently.

Situation: Telephone has become the medium of choice to communicate, world across. So much so that even Pornography has changed its medium from internet to cell phones.
The direct inference from this shocking situation can be simply put that the world is moving to one’s hand. Well, literally.
Considering that this will be a new situation, I can safely assume that people will react to it differently. They will need more hardware (more hidden cameras to pass on sleaze), more software (to morph faces) and a whole new language to communicate effectively.
I know the nay-sayers of this new world order will argue on last point – ‘the need of a new language to communicate’. People already have so many languages and more importantlythey have been communicating through phone in the existing languages since the time it was invented.
The counter argument I have prepared is that people used to communicate in writing through good old letters. Once this same writing changed to typing, we started using Smiley.They came up with a whole lot of them for different emotions. So the argument is short is - Why people don’t write Hi! Long time no mail (I am angry) anymore?
Laterwhen the common anatomical part used for typing changed from all digits to predominantly thumb and the number of words in a communication became directly proportional to the increase in your cell phone bill, people started using short forms like lol, brb, wru, asl etc. D 2nd argmnt.
That is why we will need a new language of communication. This prediction is based on two facts:
People will become busier and will have less time to say “I Am Happy” over Phone
Speaking long on the phone will make the person appear non-busy and may run the risk of becoming outcaste from the society.
The new language will appear more like the common emotional outburst but will be short and more dramatic. Like the Emoticons people use nowadays.
So let me call it, EMOTIBYTES (EMOTIonal soundBYTES)
I am putting down this guideline by using three most common Emoticons and hoping that people will improvise and come up with many more.
:)- I Am Smiling
Old Fashioned Practice on Phone: Just a smile.
C’mon guys, if you only smile then how the other person will come to know what your feeling is. Complete wastage of an effort.
EMOTIBYTES: Grin and make a monosyllabic noise which should sound HOOOOH HOOH HOH. And this sound should come out without opening the lips otherwise the effect will be lost.
One may appear to others as someone in trance, but don’t worry. The telephonic communication is never meant for others (not even Police)
:(- I Am Sad
Old Fashioned Practice on Phone: One will cry or keep silent.
Crying can be a costly affair as one need to hear the entire cry to prevent from appearing to be rude. And if the other person has called from a mobile phone it can be quite frustrating too - no one likes to pay money to hear others cry. And if you have called up then its not smart to cry and then shell out money. The other option of keeping silent is also bad as you are not communicating in the first place. And what is the use of calling up when one keeps mum. (I hope my wife is reading this)
EMOTIBYTES: “Boo Hoo”. The ‘Hoo’ is important as otherwise you may be mistaken for trying to scare the listener.
Its short, conveys the message and does not cost much in the pocket.
:-* - A Kiss
Old Fashioned Practice on Phone: Just planting a kiss on the receiver
A Kiss being a Kiss, I don’t want to disturb the emotion attached to it. And however, planting a kiss on the receiver does convey the message. Only downside being running the risk of tasting plastic, but I guess its worth to take that risk for a Kiss.
However, this tactic does not leave the personwith any chance toshow creativity. How will one plant a flying kiss?
EMOTIBYTES:
For a flying kiss – Plant the Kiss as one normally does and then make a sound which resembles air flowing. Flying definitely involves air blowing. Butkeeping asidethe technicality of relationship between Flying and Air Blowing, let me elaborate the style a bit more. The sound should be something between a whistle and a ‘Phew’. This will effectively communicate a flying kiss. And you get full value for money for letting your sweetheart know that you are not just kissing but sending her a flying kiss. Wow! How Romantic it will be.
The list can be endless and it will take me a full book to explain all the EMOTIBYTES for the various emotions people have.
Let me get into my techie side and name this is EMOTIBYTES beta version. This will indirectly ask all of you to think about how to develop more EMOTIBYTES for other emotions and allow me to take a break and concentrate on other inventions meanwhile keeping the entire credit for developing this new lingo when itbecomes bugproof
So take deeper look inside (your soul, of course) and find out the different emotions you have. Then may be you can start finding suitable EMOTIBYTES for the same.
p.s. A simple guide for inventing new and effective EMOTIBYTES is watch any kid before he/she has learned to speak. They are the best example of ‘I was born a genius in EMOTIBYTES; language ruined me’.


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