The Note Good-bye

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
A girl writes her final letter good-bye

Submitted: July 10, 2015

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Submitted: July 10, 2015

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As a child my life was perfect.

I walked to school with my friends everyday.

The world was my playground.

I was so care free and everybody liked me. 

I dreamed of how my life would be in the future.

This wasn't how I planned it.

 

I assumed High School would be the time of my life.

I figured everyone would love me and welcome me.

I thought I would have at least one friend.

I figured it all wrong.

 

When I walk down the hall people stare.

No one speaks or waves. 

No one responds when I call their names.

No one ever even tries to be my friend.

 

At home my life wasn't great either.

A few years ago my father died.

He was on his way home from work when he had a heart attack.

At least that's what the doctors say.

Now I wish that I had gone with him.

I wish that I had begged him to take me with so that I wouldn't have had to stay here.

I wish he had come home and he never left me alone with my mother and sister.

 

I knew she couldn't handle being without him.

I knew she would go out and come home with the first man to even look at her.

I just wish my father had known how much we needed him.

Ever since my mother married the man she found, most likely in a bar.

He made us move and leave behind our friends. 

He forced us to turn our backs on our happy lives.

The worst part is that my mother is to blind to even notice.

Life has been different, and not in a good way.

 

My mother was always working.

My step-father I wish did the same.

He stays home everyday with nowhere to go.

My sister and I can always tell when he's coming.

You can smell his breath from down the block and a sudden chill fills the air.

 

We try to avoid him as much as possible.

Avoid the hand that lives to torture in more ways then one.

At night we beg he doesn't come to our room.

When we hear the floor boards screech in the hall we pray that he won't stop.

He always stops in front of our room, always.

 

In the morning I quickly grab my things and we head off to school.

I drop my sister off first and she begs me not to leave but I don't have a choice.

One day a while back I tried to leave.

My sister and I skipped school but he still found us.

He made sure to show us we could never leave.

Except of course we could leave for school.

 

School is supposed to be my escape.

My one place where my life is better but it isn't, it never is.

The children pick on me and call me names.

A few beat me and add to my collection of bruises.

 

I wish that I would stand up to them.

I wish I could tell them how much it hurts.

I wish that if I did they would actually listen but I know they wouldn't.

I know that I can't handle the pain much longer and there is only one way to silence it.

 

My sister tries to tell me it isn't the answer.

She says there are other ways to handle it.

But lately she to has been losing hope.

I know that soon she will see things my way.

 

We have nothing to lose.

No one waits for us to get home.

No one even tries to be friendly.

So in a sense this note is good-bye.

 

To my mother who knows nothing.

This is what I go through everyday.

This is what happens because you are never home.

This is the reason I took my sister and the car.

This is why we took the medicine from the cupboard.

This is why when you wake up tomorrow you won't see us in our beds.

 

I wish I could say you could change my mind.

I wish you could say you love me too much.

I wish that I even had an ounce of me regretting this decision.

 

I am happy that we are leaving.

I am happy because I will see father once again.

I know that he will be happy too see me.

He is the one good thing that will come to me.

The one that helped me make this choice, because you couldn't.

 

I bet you won't even cry when you read this. 

I bet this is a burden that you forgot you even had.

I bet that nothing will change for you.

So now I say good-bye to the cruel world you didn't even know we lived in.

But most of all good-bye to you because you are the reason I gave up the fight.


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