Size Plus

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic
Being a woman is hard. Being a woman who is "plus size" is...

Submitted: June 02, 2011

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Submitted: June 02, 2011

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How do you reassure someone who has went their whole life believing they weren’t beautiful, who have mentally berated themselves for not being as pretty as the other girls, who have categorized themselves as ugly, or fat, that they are indeed beautiful? How do you do so without them feeling like every word you’re saying isn’t complete bull, that there’s truth in your words and that you actually mean it? Maybe you can’t convince them if you can’t even convince yourself. Maybe I’m just speaking for myself. We all have our days right? Where nothing fits right, hugs a little too tight, those probably shouldn’t wear that in daylight days right? Try having one of those lives. Where the thought of shopping calls for deep sighs, cuz most stores with cute clothes don’t carry a size that would make it past my thighs, and friends wonder why I hate shopping. Its not even the fact that I actually have to go to a whole other section entitled Plus Size just to find something that will actually fit, or the fact that most designers idea of stylish “plus size” clothing consists of some type of animal, floral, or other nauseatingly dizzying print, no not even that. It’s the fact that no matter what is tried on, whether it fits or not when looking in the mirror I don’t feel pretty, sexy or beautiful. Or at least I didn’t. All I could I see were imperfections, flaws, inadequacies from head to toe as my eyes roamed over what I now jokingly refer to as my jiggly puffs, or wobbly bits. None of which I ever thought could be defined as attractive. No man would want what I was staring at in my mind. Honestly when someone believes something about themselves it doesn’t matter how much you try to convince them otherwise, nope, there’s no guarantee in our minds that we aren’t being duped due to lies. So how do you reassure someone who has never felt gorgeous, or sensual or worthy that they are? It’s not easy. It’s not easy to convince yourself that you are. Not when we live in a time where looks matter for no reason. Judgment is passed constantly, there‘s always something wrong to find, if you have a pretty face then someone’s talking about your clothes, if you have nice clothes someone’s talking about your hair, got a nice body then you must be a rhymes with witch, got a not so nice body then you’re fat, ugly, disgusting even. There’s always, always something wrong even when there isn’t. Growing up in such a destructive environment breaks down souls, shreds the esteem of self, penetrates the spirits of children who evolve into insecure women who wear those insecurities more than their favorite accessories because it’s the only thing they’ve ever slipped on that they couldn’t bare to take off no matter how bad it looks on them, excuse me, I mean on us. We are our own worst enemies when we fight ourselves, place ourselves in body image warfare and go in as warriors with no will.


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