Teenage J.J. Abrams begins to study the occult with one purpose in mind. Finally, after years of study in the dark arts, he is ready. "Oh Dark Lord Satan! I summon you, I offer you my soul!" He chants in front of black candles at midnight. The Devil appears and says "Tell me, for what will you sell your fragile soul, mortal?" Young Mr. Abrams replies "I want to be in charge of Star Trek AND Star Wars!" To which Lucifer responds by saying, "You're crazy Kid, I don't have that kind of juice, I'm just The Devil.".
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