It has been three years! Three years since you have gone Mum. Believe me it was about 30 years. I don’t know from where I got the strength! I don’t know how I handled it or how I’m still handling it.
Would you please tell me how can I go on without you? How can I live as a normal girl?
As before Mum.
When you were here . .
Adam, Leila and I, we all transfer our pain into a piece of paper and then cut it so we relief our anger and sadness as u told as once to do Mum! We don’t even talk to each other about you! But I can notice the look in their eyes that says “we miss you Mum”.
They all lost the hope for your return, even Dad! He became so thin and I don’t remember how he looks like when he smiles. He lost his motivation and became old.
Mum you just left without telling us, without a sign! I’m the only one in this house who likes talking to you daily. I don’t think that there’s any work in this life can keep me away or busy from you. I feel that you can hear me; I can hear your laugh, see your smile and feel your hug!!
I really miss you Mum.
Sitting silently, watching through the window hopelessly. Hearing the beautiful sounds of the birds.
Suddenly, it is like I heard something! I quickly turned my face and everything was normal. I continued watching through the window and I was kind of scared. I was asking myself … what if?
I heard the same thing again; I did not turn my face. I prayed that I see what I wish to see. I slowly turned my face..
It is real
I did not do anything except watching your face Shockley. I couldn’t even move!
It is like someone hit me and I realized that I must do something!!
I ran towards you and shouted
I held your soft and cold hand
I cried like a child!
Your mouth was moving like you wanted to say something
Your eyes were barely opened!
It is a miracle
I ran like a crazy person, I opened the door and ran downstairs to call dad!
He was in his office checking his currency collection.
I opened the door; I couldn’t stand and fell in the ground.
My dad threw his medical glasses
He held me and shouted what is going on!!
I was shacking and said
Mum is awake
He said “what did you say”?
I shouted “mum is awake dad!!!!”
He suddenly disappeared from my sight
I didn’t move
I remained laying on the ground
It has been 2 years since you left the hospital and came to our house.
Doctors told us that it is a clinical death; it means you can’t feel, hear or do anything and the chance to wake is 20%!
But I knew that they are wrong!! You are strong as I’ve always known!!
Suddenly, dad shouted calling us he was laughing and his face was full of tears.
I could hear Adam and Leila’s screams and laughs.
I remained laying with no movements
Full of hope
Welcome back Mum
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