So Yesterday..

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic
Just a little something i wrote after me and my boyfriend of 9 month broke up

Submitted: December 08, 2010

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Submitted: December 08, 2010

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Some people say that the day of being dumped is the hardest. I somewhat agree with that statement. When it first happens the shock is what hits you the hardest. The concept isn’t really understood until you turn away from him, or say you have to go; it is only at the moment that the conversation rapidly repeats itself in your head, and you fully understand that something you hold dear to you has just ended. Then there is a rush of emotions. You feel sad, relieved, happy, depressed, totally and utterly pissed off, and most of all: Alone.

There are tears, sobs, cries from a slowly breaking heart. People deal with the eventual realization in different ways. I wrapped myself in a blanket and cried on my bathroom floor for an hour. I prayed and I begged for help from who ever would listen, and then I fell asleep, wrapped in my blanket, my make-up looking surprisingly similar to Alice Cooper’s, and hoping that my dreams would be kind to me.

But what people don’t realize is that the day after it all happens can be worse. True, there are fewer tears, less outcries of pain and anguish. There are no more signs of his existence in your room because in a fit of rage you put everything and anything to do with him in a box and shoved it under your bed, swearing never to open and to burn it someday in the future. However, to wake with the sudden and violent realization that it is all over is the worst feeling in the world. To finally understand that life will never be the same, and that, from that terrible conversation yesterday, you would never give him another chance, that is far worse than the actual dumping. Realizing that the thing that made you happy for the past 9 months had ended and your relationship with him will never be the same, knowing that you will never be able to touch him in the same way, or kiss him again, or even look at him with out a terrible urge to cry, that understanding is one of the worst feelings that I have ever felt.

But then you have to get up. You have to put you clothes on. You have to put your make-up on. You have to go downstairs and face a life that changed so rapidly in two days. You have to eat your breakfast, and you have to go on. You have to go on and live life with a vigor and necessity to succeed and move on. You have to understand that it’s not over, you’re not dead, life just threw you a curve ball and you have to decide what you’re going to do with the options and paths that now lay in front of you, because there are many, and life is waiting for you to make a decision and run.

You have to run, run like you’ve never run before. Take life in you hands and hold it tightly and run. Don’t look back, don’t wonder and wait and hope for things to feel better. You will never feel better wrapped in a blanket, sitting on your bathroom floor. Find something to live for; you have to find something solid and pure, and just run.

There are too many things in this life that are beautiful. These are too many things that can hold you up bring light back into your life. It doesn’t have to be the end, because with every ending there is new life; when a door is closed, a window is opened. When it seems like God is not with, and you feel alone, you must realize that He is there to carry you at these times of need.

The day after is the worst, but the most fulfilling because you you’re not alone, you know that life isn’t as bad it seems, and you now realize that there are so many hot guys out there that it would be a complete pity to hide in a blanket on your bathroom floor. Yeah, you might still be hung up on that one guy, but he broke your heart, and he doesn’t deserve the satisfaction of knowing that your life is over because of him. He’s not worth the tears; he’s not worth the time.

Live your life for you. Laugh at the obstacles ahead. Love yourself.

You don’t need anyone to hold you up. You don’t need anyone to wipe your tears. You are strong, you are tough, and you are alive.

Life is the greatest gift in the world. Although it might be tough sometimes, it will always go on, just run with it.


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