Friendship vs. Romance

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic
How many people in the World hide their feelings inside them and never have the courage to speak up?

Submitted: September 15, 2012

A A A | A A A

Submitted: September 15, 2012




How many people in the World hide their feelings inside them and never have the courage to speak up? Perhaps, there are millions of those people spread around the entire planet and by the time they realize what they really were looking for was just right by their side, it might be late to speak up or take any action. Everyone has their different reasons for hiding their feelings and not stepping out of their comfort zones. Most common reason I have personally encountered recently is the fear. The fear of hearing a negative response, the fear of admitting how you really feel about someone,firstly to yourself, the fear of not knowing what will happen next - all these potential fears lead to the fact that people do not open up and start lying to themselves about their feelings. That’s why people go out and date random people, make mistakes and have their best friends by their side to comfort them when they are going through a break up or a rough patch in the relationship. Being someone’s best friend is like playing on the safe side - you get to spend time with them as much as you want, you get to be yourself and share your darkest secrets yet you have no obligations, no responsibilities and no fear of losing them in any possible way. Chances of breaking up with your best friend are lower than breaking up with your girlfriend or boyfriend. However, people underestimate the power of friendship and sometimes fall into the trap of their own tangled feelings - yet the communication between the two parties is so restricted that one doesn’t really know what to expect. This observation came to me not only from my personal experience but also from what I tend to see on every day basis. Typically, there are a couple of stages that everyone goes through.


Step One: Acquaintance


First time you see the person in your life and whether you notice or not there will be an attraction between the two of you in one way or another. After a short conversation you find out that you share some sort of same interest - which trust me is good enough basis for a good friendship.


Step Two: A Friend In Need Is A Friend Indeed


Being a human being no one is insured not to have any problems where we simply need to talk and share your feelings with someone - sometimes this is the step where the darkest secrets come out. You go out for a drink and then they spill their problems and all they are looking for is a friend to be there for them. In return you share your secrets and throughout this conversation you will find out more about each other and at some point you will feel as if you have known each other for a lifetime.


Step Three: It’s A Boy Girl Thing


Before you know it, one day he/she will tell you that they are in love with someone. And usually this is a stage where you figure out what you want from the other person. If you are happy for them and their life - then you are definitely friends yet if it hurts you inside a little, and you feel like someone just pinched your heart, this means that there is a hint that you want a romantic relationship with your best friend.


Step Four: Denial


You deny anyone’s and everyone’s statement that one day you two will be the perfect couple - though deep inside it is exactly what you want.


Step Five: Acceptance


At this point all is left to do is to accept - accept the current situation whatever it is at that point of life, will be different for each person.


My best friend once told me that I am the “captain of my emotion” and so is everyone else our life, fate, emotions and feelings can be guided by us - it is in our power to change things in our life. I believe in fate and destiny but I also believe that what we do and what we say contributes and shapes our destiny and fate. It is a shame that people do not speak up and hide behind computers and phones when talking to people they care about and they love. The communication and I mean the pure communication - phone calls for example - has faded away because of the technological advances and as much as these help to stay in contact with millions of people abroad they create a barrier between the two most close people in the entire world. Of course, we don’t realize that as we don’t think about that - why think about something so complex yet simple at the same time when you can just close your eyes and pretend that your life is exactly as you want it to be? 


Many films and books are written dedicated to the subject of friendship and romance, most of them have a happy ending - making us believe in magic and idealize the world that we live in. Many people that watch and read these pieces of work, believe in them and secretly hope that one day the fairytale will come to their life just like that. The thing is that when the love, fate, destiny, fairytale, call it whatever you want, knocks on your door you have to let it into your life and most importantly let the person into your heart. The only way of doing that, the way I see it is to communicate your feelings to the other party - let them know how you feel and let go of fear and then your dream fairytale will come true. Staying closed and tangled in your feelings will do no good for anyone in this already complicated world.


So all I am saying is life is too short to fear the consequences of telling someone how you feel so maybe we should just think about it and let that someone special in our lives and tell them the truth - who knows maybe they feel the same way about you.

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