Those Damn Wet Bandits!

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
This poem is based on the 1990 'Home Alone' movie.

Submitted: November 14, 2014

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Submitted: November 14, 2014

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Two inept crooks robbed my house while I was on vacation.
They left my water running and they died by strangulation.
Besides robbing me, those idiots also made me have to pay a two hundred dollar water bill.
They were already beaten by our neighbors eight year old son, as crooks, they had no skill.
I decided to go to the Police Station and post their bail.
Before I was through, they wanted to go back to jail.
I shot them in their crotches and burned their heads with my blowtorch.
Those dumbasses were screaming in agony because their heads were scorched.
Before strangling them, I used my shotgun to blow off their kneecaps.
Everybody had better start to learn that I will not take people's crap!


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