Dark voices whispering softly into my head, sweet yet sickening sounds of words forming where they should not. The pain of the sounds clawing at the inside of my skull like a jagged clawed hand tearing into the soft texture of my spirit as it lays defenseless before the unrelenting attack.
The pain forming words as the whispers carry deeper into my mind, the feelings of worthlessness amplified by the intangible assault deep within my senses as the feeling of emptiness begins to form in the pit of my stomach and spreading through my body gnawing at me like a hunger unable to be satisfied.
"Your worthless" the first sound that becomes something you can understand filters into my head as a sense of defiance forms within my body and I want to scream back "I am not". But another voice comes through the darkness within my mind "You know you would be better off dead" the emptiness in my stomach gripping my body making me feel so sick.
The whispering voice suddenly becoming a sweetly delicate sound almost like a friend as it breathes soft words into my head "I. understand your pain and you just need to let go" as a sense of calm fall over me letting the words settle in my mind before the voice whispers again "Yes, that is it. Let it all go and you will find peace"
A tear forms in the corner of my eye as the memories of my life flash in my mind as the images of friends gone and love no longer slowly stripping me of the joy I once held within me. "No one cares, they all betray you" the voice whispers again pushing me towards release from the pain I feel within me.
My head drops lower as I let the feeling of sweet release wash over "just listen to my words and we will find the strength to end it all" the voice whispers into my unresisting mind as I look around the room seeing the knife sitting there just out of reach from me as I move forward in my chair the sound of it creaking the only sound to be heard.
My hand touching the cold handle of the knife sending an inexplicable chill through my arm and into my body as I grip it tighter looking down as it shines so brightly in the light from the buld above. Slowly turning the knife over in my hand and examining the sharp jagged edges of the blade as I feel the tears fall freely from my eyes as they trail down my cheeks.
"Together we will release you from this pain" whispers the voice of my new found friend and source of strength as I feel the edge of the blade against the skin on my wrist as I look down at it as it is brought slowly back across my wrist barely pressing down as I watch a thin white line form on my skin where the blade crosses the flesh.
My head coming up as the feeling of emptiness is replaced with a sense of defiance forming like a hot flash in my mind and spreading out through my body as I let go of the knife letting it drop from my hand as my eyes watch it twist through the air before clattering to the ground and laying motionless at my feet.
"Coward" The voice in my head hisses like a child not getting it's own way. It is full of resentment and malice as it almost breathes with a life of it's own inside my head "You will suffer every day until you find the courage to end it" it breathes softly into my head before falling silent as the tears drip from my face and fall to the floor at my feet.
© Copyright 2016 Rob Hartley. All rights reserved.