Death of a Season

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic
Rebirth of a nuance.

Submitted: November 03, 2012

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Submitted: November 03, 2012

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"I can't believe that they're still selling that thing called 'love' down by the freeway," she stated, "and at those prices, I'm sure they're making a killing."

My eyes stayed fixed on the side of the road we were on, and I gave her the uncertain glance I'd felt her comment deserved. She'd spent the entire night before wrapped up in my arms telling me how much she was happy to have found me and how much she'd been frightened of falling in love again so suddenly. I knew, at the time, she wasn't saying what she really meant, but I let her go on in her dazed speech. Now, with the sun shining through the window pane holding up my head, I saw the reflection of my sad eyes and saw deeper in them the anguish she was creating in my head. This wasn't far from over, and it wasn't going to be heading anywhere I'd want it to before the day was over.

"It makes me sick how they're still making everybody believe that love's real," she continued.

"I can't believe it either," I replied in the soft tone I always seemed to use with her. "There's nothing more detrimental to today's society than the way they'll sell you your emotions, then ask you if you were happy with what you'd purchased."

She smiled at me and grabbed my hand while keeping the wheel steady with the other. We weren't heading anywhere important, so I didn't see the point in her being so careful with the car. She could drive us both off the side of the road and leave me there, torn from my seat by the impact into the gorde, bleeding out of my ears to the devices I'd caught myself up in once again. This was where I slipped back into my head and started picturing it all:

Me, dying in the sun lit cab of her car while she ran off for help. It would come too late and I'd be far gone to the light, and no remorse would've been felt, because at this point, I felt like I deserved it.

She kissed the back of my hand, and I came back to the car we were both flying down the road in. I wondered why she didn't say anything about the sweat filling my palm, and hers as well. I glanced at her and saw there was determination in her eyes, more than I'd ever seen before in any person's eyes. I saw her soul leaping out behind her iris and flying through her pupil at the windshield and filling the car; polluting the atmosphere with her sense of desire and determination to get it. She wouldn't let this one slide out of her grasps, like I felt she'd never do with me. I realized I'd gotten myself into something I possibly didn't want myself in, and even more so realized that I couldn't see any way of really getting myself out of it at this point. She had me wrapped around her finger and she knew it.

The signs we passed all read the town's names to me in my head and I felt the chills coming on as we started getting closer and closer to her hometown. There was an overcast sky looking down on us as we cast ourselves over miles of land and into the great countryside of our state so she could see that her old house had been demolished; I knew the memories would remain. She was just looking to see if they took out the foundation with the walls, or if they left the pit in the ground for another home to be built upon, even though I knew there was never a 'home' that had ever existed there.

"Baby," she cooed. "I'm just glad you're here with me for this. I needed somebody to keep me strong for this and you've kept me plenty vitalized to see what we're heading towards. I love you."

The last words that came out of her mouth shot through me; left me empty. I almost believed her, and almost thought that she was being sincere this time, but something brought me back to the sad reality that this girl had lost all her faith in love and, in some ways, I had through her.


© Copyright 2020 Sal Gelles. All rights reserved.

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