Necromancy For Dummies

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
It's not easy being a sentient skeleton mage; especially when you have pesky, adventuring heroes break into your lair all the time.

Cover by Markie Bee:

Table of Contents

These Are Not the Heroes You're Looking For

Submitted: July 01, 2017

They came to slay an evil lich and fulfill their quest as heroes. What they found was... not quite that.
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Demons: The Predictable and Cliché

Submitted: July 02, 2017

What's with all these uninvited guests lately?
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What the Crux?

Submitted: July 02, 2017

There seems to be a theme of spacing out into vision things. Oh, and another intruder. Yaaay?
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The Fellowship of the Jar

Submitted: July 02, 2017

Questions get asked, jokes get cracked, references get shamelessly thrown around. It's Neet. What'd you expect?
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FHA: Failed Heroes Anonymous

Submitted: July 02, 2017

And so their quest begins with the surprise guest appearance of an old friend. Did I say 'friend'? I meant 'dimwitted buffoon'.
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I'd Ship Them; I'd Ship Them So Hard

Submitted: July 02, 2017

So much abuse, but this ship won't sink that easily!
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And In Rode Mr. Knight Shyamallama

Submitted: July 09, 2017

Selia wakes up in Neet's lair. But where's Neet?
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Impractical Weapons Are Not Impractical, Apparently

Submitted: July 09, 2017

Neet's cathartic release continues unabated - that is, until yet another uninvited guest shows up.
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Unholy Cow!

Submitted: July 15, 2017

The Ghoul King has escaped, and Neet pursues him. After Neet makes his way to a hidden level of the Nine Hells, he confronts its ruler - and you won't bull-lieve what happens next!
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My Ship Sails On

Submitted: July 16, 2017

The battle continues to wage in epic proportions. Will Neet save the ghostly damsel in distress? Will the bovine demon lord finally be vanquished? What awaits our sort-of hero? I don't know. Read
the chapter.
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I Can't Steven Right Now

Submitted: August 10, 2017

Neet and Selia catch up on lost time, only to be caught up in another trap. How will they prevail this time? I don't know... maybe with a little helping of JUSTICE!
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Three at the Gate, One in the Bush

Submitted: September 16, 2017

Now a party of three, our kinda heroes make their way to the Ghoul King's castle. What perils await them this time? More importantly, will Neet care? If you think he will, you're reading the wrong
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Big Ghouls Don't Cry

Submitted: September 21, 2017

"And I'm gonna miss you like a dragon misses their gold hoard, but I gotta get a move on with my quest..." Shut up! I'm not crying, you're crying!
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The Floors Have Hands

Submitted: October 26, 2017

Our heroes enter the ominous Citadel of Evil Tropes, and Selia discovers something new about herself. Also, more shameless puns and references.
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Scions, Rhymers, and Chairs, Oh My!

Submitted: November 01, 2017

They're off to see the Ghoul King, the horrible Ghoul King of Tropes!
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Keep Calm and Necromance

Submitted: January 11, 2018

Faced with a terrible realization, our hero must look within himself. Oh, and the 5 Stages of Grief suck.
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Revenge is a Dish Best Served Ironically

Submitted: January 13, 2018

At last, the hour of extinction has come! The Grave Lord has called upon his demonic armies to unleash them upon the world for the utter annihilation of all life... So where is everyone?!
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"Zombadin" is a Trademark of Neet the Not-Lich Necromancer

Submitted: April 05, 2018

Neet's plans for the Grave Lord begin. Sit back, grab some popcorn, and read how the Grave Lord is made an idiot this time.
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The Signs Have It

Submitted: April 19, 2018

What's better than getting revenge on a vengeful demon god? Revenge trolling a vengeful demon god, that's what.
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Roll for Deception

Submitted: May 10, 2018

The Grave Lord confronts Neet. Will their rivalry, at last, reach it's fated conclusion? Will Neet finally get Selia's soul back, or will the Grave Lord have his long-sought victory? Pfff what do I
look like, a spoiler guy?
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Whose Life Is It, Anyway?

Submitted: May 17, 2018

True to his style, Neet messes with the Grave Lord before their final showdown for the greatest reason of all -- an overly elaborate one-liner.
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Insert Name of Epic Music Score Here

Submitted: July 22, 2018

It's the fi-nal beat-down!
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Happy End

Submitted: July 23, 2018

The epic saga of Neet the Not-Lich Necromancer comes to a close.
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