Part 4: Marmalade

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic

This is part 4 of a 9 part series of poems about a fantasy world in which I get stuck. The animals speak, and are generally unhelpful while I try to find a way to get home.

They were all written when I was in my mid to late teens and were received well by my friends at the time. I just thought it would be nice to get them out to a wider audience.

Submitted: September 07, 2017

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Submitted: September 07, 2017



Part 4



My marmalade is golden

Just like a chestnut tree

Growing from a cliff top

High above the sea

It has shredded lumps

And crusty looking rind

Its fragrance is of pigeon

And buffalo’s behind

It looks a bit mouldy

With little bits of fluff

Its sell by date is gone

But I haven’t used enough

There’s plenty in the jar

To feed a medium sized camel

I just hope that in time

It won’t rot his tooth enamel


When the jar is empty

My life won’t be the same

I’d have to find a hobby

Or invent a new board game

One that involves hedgehogs

And other woodland mammals

Jumping over tussocks

And sharp shards of fence panels


The aim would be to get

From the centre of the board

To a place just on the outskirts

Dodging a pig wielding a sword

It would need to be quite hard

So it wouldn’t be done too soon

There would need to be a chicken

Eating ice cream without a spoon

He’d be pecking at chocolate chips

And lumps of toffee crisp

And talking to a goldfish

With a debilitating lisp


The prize at the finish

Would be a lucky charm

A great big golden trinket

That protects from any harm

The winner would be happy

And would sing a happy song

The song would be quite tuneful

And would be quite long

When the song is sung

The losers will go home

Back to separate houses

To have a little moan

The pieces would be lead

Like in Monopoly

There wouldn’t be any horses

Like in Totopoly

There would be three dice

And a plastic cup shaker

Two pieces would be butchers

And the third a baker

At the end there’d be

A great big neon sign

Saying it had ended

Highlighted with a line

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