Dear Big Girl

Reads: 134  | Likes: 0  | Shelves: 0  | Comments: 2

More Details
Status: Finished  |  Genre: True Confessions  |  House: Booksie Classic
Who I Am Underneath

Submitted: August 23, 2012

A A A | A A A

Submitted: August 23, 2012

A A A

A A A


 

Dear Big Girl,

When I walk down the street I can feel people staring at me. They aren’t appreciating who they see, they are sizing up my physical faults and deciding what kind of person I am.  Often they can’t keep their thoughts to themselves and they moo or laugh at me, or make their staring very obvious by hanging out of their car window and looking back at me as they drive by. 

I carry the majority of my weight in my stomach so people assume I’m pregnant, even though my tummy is more like a tire around my waist than a beautiful baby belly.  Women congratulate me on Mother’s Day for carrying life, even though the odds of having a child with the illness I have is great, therefore I regrettably have chosen not to have children. 

Men look at me in disgust, or not at all.  I grew up believing all women should be respected.  I later learned that it’s okay to disregard that rule with large girls.  I guess men think it’s okay because we can just eat our feelings later.  I also didn’t believe a person could be invisible until I gained weight. Now men bump into me all the time and claim they didn’t see me, although I take up more space than the average person.

Most days I settle myself with the idea that I will only have worth, be beautiful, and matter once I am smaller than I currently am now. I know I must conquer my food addictions for my health and myself, but I didn’t realize I also needed to do so in order to make others feel more comfortable. It takes time to make changes, and the public isn’t ready to give me that. I just wish they could see who I am underneath it all.

Sincerely,

Lost under pounds


© Copyright 2017 Sara Nisbet. All rights reserved.

Add Your Comments:

Comments

avatar

Author
Reply

avatar

Author
Reply

More True Confessions Miscellaneous

Booksie 2017-2018 Short Story Contest

Booksie Popular Content

Other Content by Sara Nisbet

Dear Big Girl

Miscellaneous / True Confessions

Popular Tags