Thinking of you!

Reads: 479 | Likes: 0 | Shelves: 0 | Comments: 7

Everyone has somebody that they can't stop thinking about, for me it's my boyfriend. I never know what he's thinking about and he always says the wrong things, but I love him and that's the only thing that matters really! This is just a poem I wrote when I was annoyed at him, hope you like it. xx

I lay in bed thinking of you,

Not knowing what to do,

Wondering what you’re thinking about,

It’s not going to be me I doubt.

Sometimes when you speak to me you seem really blunt,

Searching for a clue I hunt and I hunt,

Hoping one day you’ll tell me the truth,

And when you do I’m going to need proof.

You say one thing but mean another,

One of these days I’m going to ask for a straight answer,

Then what are you going to do?

When I’m standing there waiting for you?

Are you going to hope that I’ll take you back?

Even though it’s respect you lack?

I don’t think so! Not anymore!

It wasn’t your heart that apart you tore!

Why did you do it? Why was it me?

Was it something I did? Something I said?

You don’t understand, so why don’t you let me?

Submitted: June 29, 2011

Romance

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Thomas Mind

Very good.

You would like the work of Roethke. Keep building your style. I do not know if you realize you have a gift of vision, now you know. Use it now that you know it, and put it into your work, because you have here, and you did it right.

Thomas

Thu, June 30th, 2011 3:56pm

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Really? I didn't really think I was good, thank you :) I will and oh i'll have a look at their work then.

Thu, June 30th, 2011 10:22am

Shazza

This is beautiful, i love it, it is a very nice style and it showcases that you have an amazing talent in the writing of poems, Keep it up!!??

Sun, July 3rd, 2011 2:38pm

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Thankyou :) means a lot that you took the time to read it, and I will! :) ??

Sun, July 3rd, 2011 7:45am

arun

Seeing the title I thought that this poem got its inspiration from Katy Perry's...

It is exquisite, smooth from the start till the end. And I would suggest to give your poem a more dramatic effect, try to match the syllables of all the verses. If not syllable, at least the number of words in each line. Not a compulsion. If you try, you'll see the difference...

As usual, I love it. It's really freaking awesome... Especially the 2nd verse is really breathtaking! Keep writing and Kmu...

Sun, July 3rd, 2011 4:40pm

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I didn't know katy perry had a song called that? And thanks for the advice :) i'll have a go at writing a poem like that then.. thank you for your lovely comment and taking the time to read it :) xx

Sun, July 3rd, 2011 10:35am

whiteroses

This is beautiful...
Again if you need to talk I am here for you! xooxox

Mon, July 4th, 2011 4:04pm

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Thank you once again, i'll keep that in mind!! :) xxx

Mon, July 4th, 2011 9:11am

BooksRule

I love this ^^ I've never been big on poetry, but recently I've seen more meaning behind the words people write ... and this is the best example yet!

Beautifully written - let me know when you right more stuff? :)

Thu, July 7th, 2011 7:42pm

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Aww well thank you :) and yeah I will, i've always liked poetry, it's the only main thing you can write with meaning behind it :) xx

Thu, July 7th, 2011 1:00pm