The Pool of Wishes

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic

A girl searches far and wide, to find a pool that will hopefully bring her father back.

The shimmering pool sat complacent before her, the cave that held it not allowing an inch of wind to dare unsettle the smooth surface. She had travelled far to be there through treacheries and pain, but standing there now, she knew it all worth it.

“The pool of wishes.” The words whispered off her tongue, echoing around the cave. It had only been a fantasy when she had first heard of it when she was young, but when her father had died, she had searched for the truth far and wide. She had been hopeful, and she had found.

Her father had been all she ever had, the one she depended on, the one she loved. When he died she thought time would heal it, but after three years she knew that time was not her friend. She missed him, and she had to find him. This pool, the story that spoke of its possibility, was all she had. And she had searched, and now she had found.

The pool sparkled. She stepped forward, she knew what it do. She knelt before the edge, and her hands reached out to dip themselves into the smooth liquid. It was cool, and her hands disappeared into a shimmer. She cupped them and pulled them out, a small pool of water dripping through her fingers. She took a deep breath, she had waited so long for this moment.

“I wish I could see my father again.” The water touched her lips, and she drank.

Her eyes closed, she felt the water swell through her body. She was becoming light, she was being encompassed in a light. She could have been tumbling, or staying still, she couldn’t tell, but when she no longer felt the water coursing through her body, she opened her eyes.

He was there, his standing figure shining in light.

She smiled, and he smiled back at her.

She didn’t need to look around, she knew where she was, there was only one place she could be.

He opened his arms to her and she went.

And together they were, in death.


Submitted: October 20, 2013

© Copyright 2022 Sarrow. All rights reserved.

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Comments

Richard Hughes

Hi there. Just dropped by. Thanks for a visit earlier.
I'm just here out of curiosity of what you might be writing. And, dear, I've got some gloomy thing to read here :)

Well, this is dark. And full of emotions. Very emotional.
On the contrary not so much light to the story and not so many actions. In my opinion, it is not quite satisfying for a short story. The plot lacks a feeling of fulfilment in it. But, perhaps, this could make a good poem or a song.

What I like is the depress, mysterious atmosphere around it. This left me hanging with no knowledge of what she actually had done prior to drinking from the pool. What I think still could be improve is to clarify things up a little. Like if the pool symbolises poison or one's wish is not always positive or is there anything to do about Oedipus complex.

By the way, I hope you're not in a dark place right now. I've been wandering around suicidal communities and stuffs like that recently. I'm a bit paranoia and concern!

Anyway, have a nice day! Cheers!

Mon, October 21st, 2013 11:16pm

Author
Reply

Thank you very much for all your thoughts. I was trying to write a considerably short piece so that's why it lacks further detail. And I don't write poems/song so nice idea, but it's sticking as just a story. Oh and no, I'm not in a dark place right now, I actually came up with this idea a year or so ago, I've only just gotten around to writing it. Thanks.

Mon, October 21st, 2013 7:17pm

Samantha Marcus

Wow, prose. . .Fantastic work! I loved it! Write more, please. :)

Tue, October 22nd, 2013 4:43am

Author
Reply

Thank you so much.

Mon, October 21st, 2013 11:00pm

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