The Man Who Played Farts

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
The story talks about a man who liked to play music but had no money to buy a musical instrument. Since this man farts a lot he decides to play musical pieces by farting. As this man plays musical farts while doing his housework, the neighbors find out and they start listening to his farty musical pieces daily at his doorstep.

Submitted: August 15, 2012

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Submitted: August 15, 2012

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if someone said

The Man Who Played Farts

Once there was a very poor man called Zushu who lived in Chinwana Land. Zushu liked to play music but he was so poor that he could not buy any musical instrument to play on it.

One night while Zushu was sleeping, he dreamed that he played music by farting. When he woke up the next day, he decided to try playing music by farting. So he thought about a certain musical tone and tried to play it by farting: “toz-tototoz-toz-toz toooooooz toz.” For him, it sounded funny and musical.

Every day and every night, Zushu played musical pieces by farting. He would cook, clean, eat, shower, and sleep while playing musical farts.

One day, while Zushu was playing musical farts as usual, the postman came by Zushu’s house to give Zushu a mail. While the postman was putting the mail on the door step of Zushu’s house, the postman heard someone playing musical farts. The postman laughed, but he was surprised because it something that not anyone can do. Thus, the postman told the neighbors about what he heard, so all the neighbors came to hear Zushu’s musical farts. The neighbors enjoyed Zushu’s musical farts so they came everyday to Zushu’s doorstep to listen to these musical farts.

One day, the king of Chinwana Land was passing by and saw a big crowd at Zushu’s door. The king asked, “Why is everybody crowded here?” one of the neighbors said, “in this house lives a man who plays music by farting.” The king was surprised, and he came out of his royal cart to see and listen to Zushu.

After the king had listened to Zushu’s musical farts for a while, the king knocked on Zushu’s door. Zushu opened the door and was surprised by the king and all his neighbors at the door. The king told Zushu, “I heard you playing musical farts. I enjoyed listening to them, so I decided to bring you to my castle every night to play musical farts for me and for my guests. I will pay you 100 golden coins for every show you make in my castle.” Zushu said, “With pleasure your highness!” the king said, “A royal cart will come at your door to pick you up every time I want you to make a show in the castle.”

Zushu felt happy and started to go every night to the king’s castle to play musical farts for the king and his guests. Zushu made a lot of money from the fart shows that he made in the king’s castle.

One night, while Zushu was performing his fart show in the king’s castle as usual, a very cruel princess was sitting in the castle watching Zushu’s show. This cruel princess was called Bilosia. Princess Bilosia laughed so much during Zushu’s show and enjoyed it a lot, so she decided to kidnap Zushu and enjoy his musical farts by herself in her castle. Thus, Princess Bilosia asked two of her servants to wait for Zushu outside the castle of the king of Chinwana Land. Then, when they see him, they would blow on his face the sleeping dust and bring him to her. Thus, the servants did what Princess Bilosia asked them to do and Zushu was in her castle finally.

When Zushu woke up, he found himself on a stage tied with a long chain to the ceiling and facing a thrown. Princess Bilosia came and told Zushu that if he does not do farting shows for her, he will be burned by very hot boiling water. So every night, Princess Bilosia sat on her thrown and watched him do farting shows.

Meanwhile, the king of Chinwana was worried because Zushu stopped coming to make farting shows in his castle. Thus, he went to Zushu’s house, but he didn’t find him. The king of Chinwana asked the neighbors about Zushu, but they said that they haven’t seen him for more than two weeks. The king’s worries grew more and more. Thus, the king sent a letter to the most proficient detective in Chinwana Land telling him about Zushu’s sudden disappearance and asking him to investigate and find out what happened to Zushu.

The detective carried out the assigned duty and began his investigations. The first thing the detective did was bringing his assisting dog to the castle, mainly to the spot where Zushu used to perform his show. The detective made the dog smell Zushu’s spot very well, and then asked him to find Zushu. The detective followed his dog until they reached the castle of Princess Bilosia. Thus, the detective went back to the king and said, “Your Highness, I have been able to determine the place of Zushu. He was kidnapped by the servants of Princess Bilosia. He is locked up in her castle, currently.” The king said, “Thank you for your efforts. Your mission is finished. Now, it is my turn to teach Princess Bilosia a lesson.” The king asked his vizier to reward the detective with a 1000 golden coins and write a letter to Princess Bilosia asking her to release Zushu.

Meanwhile, Zushu started feeling miserable because he was locked up. Farting musical pieces was not something he enjoys anymore. As days passed, Zushu got sick and he could not fart anymore. This made Princess Bilosia very angry. Thus, when she received the king’s letter, she asked her servants to throw Zushu in the woods.

Although Zushu was alone in the woods, he began to feel happy again because he retrieved his freedom. The cold weather in the woods made him start farting again. When Zushu’s first fart popped out, Zushu smiled and decided to play musical pieces by farting again. So Zushu walked through the woods, ate fruits from trees, and played musical farts.

Meanwhile, the king received a letter from Princess Bilosia telling him that she threw Zushu in the woods because he got sick and became unable to play musical farts anymore. Thus, the king sent his soldiers to the woods to search for Zushu.

Luckily, the soldiers were able to find Zushu easily because they heard him playing musical farts. The soldiers asked Zushu to ride the royal cart and come back to the king’s castle for treatment.

When Zushu arrived to the king’s castle, he thanked the king for saving him and said, “Your Highness, the only time I will feel that I really thanked you is when I offer you something that you don’t have. I will come back in two days to give you something that you will surely use.” The king smiled and said, “I don’t need anything Zushu. I am glad to have you back with us, and this is enough for me.” Zushu felt happy but insisted to get for the king something in return.

Finally, Zushu came up with a great idea! He decided to design a fart bomb. Zushu thought that this fart bomb needs to be special. Thus, Zushu filled a thin glass bubble with disgusting smelly farts mixed with blindness dust. When Zushu finished the fart bomb, he put it in box and took it to the king.

When the king opened the box, the king said, “What is this Zushu?” Zushu replied, “This is a fart bomb. No other king has anything like it.” The king was amazed and said, “What does it do?” Zushu explained for the king that when this bomb is thrown, it will harm the enemy in three ways: first, the enemies will feel dizzy because of the disgusting smell; second, the enemies will not be able to see anything because of the blindness dust; third, the enemies will be hurt by the broken glass after throwing the fart bomb since it has a glass layer. Thus, the king was very delighted, so he gave Zushu a bag of 1000 golden coins, and Zushu lived happily ever after.


© Copyright 2017 Sawsan El Hachach. All rights reserved.

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