My breath caught in my throat, as she walked in folding gracefully into the seat next to me. She was stunning, beautifully captivating, she reminds me of the time I came out of the closet. The way she arches those delicate eyebrows, whenever I am around. A knowing look would pass between us that could render anyone speechless.
A few years ago, I was out swimming in my pool with my little brother when I hear the most musical laughter coming from next door. I edge closer knowing full well it’s not nice to invade someone else’s privacy, but I can’t help it. I’m drawn to the sound, like a mosquito drawn to blood. I get out of the pool and towel off telling my brother to stay in the shallow end. He looks at me with a pouting look and tries to argue, but I stop him in his tracks. “Either you stay in the shallow end or I will tell mum you’re out here when you’re meant to be grounded”. I know its blackmail, but he will thank me for it later. Right now I had better issues to take care off. I walk to the edge of the garden and out the small gate, around the spikey bush that seems to catch onto everything wear. And tip toe over the small bridge that runs over the small river like flow of water. I sneak up to the edge of the next door neighbours fence and stand on my tip toes to get a better look at where this laughter is coming from.
What I don’t expect is her, her cascading hair blowing wistfully in the wind. Her flawless skin, so touchable. And her voice melts my heart like honey. My mind can only come up with one word HAWWTTT……….. I don’t really know what I was doing until I was standing in front of her, like the dork I am and staring at her gaping like she was a GODESS. She looked up and asked my name. I couldn’t think. I was overwhelmed by her voice. She asked me again what my name was and I was drawn back to reality and back to the fact that she was asking me my name. “I... uhh… I have to go sorry” I turned and ran back the way I came with blotches of deep red covering both my cheeks.
That was the first time I ever felt like this to any girl, and I’m glad that I ran away, because I ever would have anticipated that she would come over to my house knock on my door and instead of waiting she opened it and walked straight over to wear I was standing half naked with just my black bra and blue shorts on and simply stated “wanna be my girlfriend” and with that she leaned closer and wrapped her hands though my hair and kissed me with so much passion, I was at first confused of why she was kissing, but threw that thought to the back of my mind and kissed her back just as harder. Somewhere in my subconcisous I asked myself why I am kissing a girl I’m straight for fuck sake. But nevertheless we ended up in my bed with sheets wrapped around our midsection where we fell asleep together.
A short time later mum came into my room to wake me for dinner but found out I was asleep with a girl and she freaked and ran to get dad, who had been stupidly ignoring me my whole life to even know what was happening in my room. Before I could even wake the girl dad came through yanked her out of my bed and dragged her downstairs to the front door and kicked her out. All the while I’m screaming at him to let her go because I love her. And then he in turn through me out of the house and snarled at me “come back when your purified” “no dad don’t I have nowhere to go” I shake so hard standing on the front step in nothing but my bra and blue panties. Dad whirled on me and backhanded me “well you should have thought of that before you became a slut and fucked all the girls” and with that he walked away from me and slammed the door in my face.
After that I spent most of my time next door with my girlfriend, and worried less about my parents. Although the weight of what they did to me was taking its toll on me, I never back down from a confrontation, and I stood up for what I believe in.
And now as I look at her smiling over the table with a cup of coffee in her hand. I think she brought me out of my shell, and helped me face what lies beyond the edges of the closest door.
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