"Do we really have to wait until the end?"

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: True Confessions  |  House: Booksie Classic
Took a bow to write down all my thoughts that have bothered me for a couple of months.

Submitted: August 29, 2013

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Submitted: August 29, 2013



It’s September, and it’s getting pretty cold out there. But the frosty weather is nowhere near the coldness of his blood and it seems like nothing’s going to get his heart pumping like it once did when falling in love for the very first time, when seeing the smile on her face, when cheering his favourite football club, when hanging out with friends…friends. That daily routine has seen him fade into the darkness of the night,  weird thoughts have climbed up his mind. He feels good when he is alone, alone with the music he listens to, the music that makes him happy. He realizes that he lives a better life than millions of others do, but the lad cannot carry on like that, the lad thinks it does not matter how much you do for other people, or how much you care about that gorgeous, clever girl, that has driven you out of this world. It doesn’t matter, alright? That’s like building a sand-castle right on the sea-shore. Sooner or later it will collapse, oh..Your efforts are pretty much the same. But, do not take it as a discouragement, this is the way the chap feels it. After an unsuccessful bid to find his lady, the lad thought it would be hard to cope with it, it was like: “…that is her decision, and I fully respect it…” but somewhere deep inside, the lad was left scratching his head and thinking : “…where did it all go wrong…?” Oh my, did it even go well at any point, you naive boy? Maybe it was your imagination, calm down,…please calm d…
The lad loved walking, walking miles until he reached his home, because that long walks were always meditative and the guy actually acknowledged some points. Well one of his walks went the other way. Listening to the music he had in the playlist, they chap stumbled on one fine track called ‘Saeglopur’ by Sigur Ros, Icelandic band that has given colours to his life. Well, the lad went towards the cliff, there he found a bench right on the edge of the lonely cliff and sat down on the bench. When looking around, he found a carving on the wooden bench that had a simple question on it ‘Do we really have to wait until the end?’. The next thing he saw, was something impeccable, something that no other person has ever seen a glimpse of it. After reading out the carving on the bench, the sun broke down and shone all over the deep and patient sea. That was a perfect sunset, his inner world was happier than ever, he’d never felt that close to perfection. Mind you, the guy had his mobile phone with him, he entered the social website he usually uses, updated his status to – “Spending my best ever sunset, alone, the way I like it”, most of his acquaintances did not take a bow to rate it, some of his mates may have liked it, well, he never dreamt for popularity, the ones that cared about him, would surely find out how is he doing. He knew he was on brink of craziness, that would mentally destroy his relatives and friends, he never tried his ego because it would burn all the goods. Holding his phone with his slim and soft hands, he sent a farewell message to his mates – “Wasn’t that , like, the best part of our lives, we have ever had? I know this might hurt you, but I’m no longer eager to continue this routine, I’m no longer interested in fulfilling this society, I’m no longer playing the role of a pawn in this world, but you all, have been the best experience of my life. Without you, I would never know how it feels like to be part of such a great gang, or what it feels like when someone cares about you. Without that beautiful girl, I would never know how it feels like to fall in love so unexpectedly and keep it going for a couple of years, that have unfortunately been transformed into just some outstanding memories that have never the next chapter. I have been so happy after the night we all danced together, I felt lucky at times, but I was quickly stopped as I saw all my efforts kissing the lips of another person, just right in front of me, how cool is that, eh? Again, you have all been my greatest experience, I never wanted it to stop but that is how we cope with our fates that are manipulated my some mysterious creations. I love you all, hope to see you all soon, bye…” His closest mates have reacted quickly, they could not believe it, as they were rushing towards that lonely cliff. The guy put his phone on the bench, he was pretty sure he could call the girl he loved and wish her all the best, because that is what she deserves but he could hardly press the button ‘Call’ so he just left the phone on the bench, and stepped closer to the edge of the cliff, nearing his end. The sun shone one more time, it was one last time, the sunlight was like a flashback for him that took him on tour to see the best bits of his small life, right afterwards a cold wind shrugged off his fear of death and he made a step closer to the exit door. A car was approaching really fast, his mates were eager to stop him, and they quickly got out of the car and ran towards their lad. Whereas the chap heard shouts that were begging him not to do it but still he kept concentrated on what was about to be the hardest decision he has ever made. Remember the track I mentioned earlier? Yes, ‘Saeglopur’ by Sigur Ros, the track stuck in his mind, he did not really hear his friends running towards him, he closed his eyes to enjoy the music inside him. His friends were pretty close when suddenly, he turned back to wave for the last time, and leaned back, to fall into the deep sea, that has been waiting for him for ages. His friends did not manage to catch him, he fell into the sea. His friends stood on the edge of the cliff but they couldn’t see him as it was getting darker. They were shouting and searching for him in the water hoping that he was alive, but the lad kept sinking down. Somehow, the sun shone in to the sea, the guys gathered to see if he is there and actually saw him but now he was ‘ far away ‘ from them, the sun struck it’s last light and the guy passed away with a smile on his face, that was more than a smile, oh.. that was something amazing actually, the smile showed how happy he was to leave this routine. Now, the guy is forever sitting on that bench, listening to the sounds of the night, the deep sea and his inner world as well, enjoying the sunsets and the other side…

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