Things I Love and Hate About Booksie

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
These are half-true jokes in a script form. Please do not take offensively, but they contain messages about the site in some ways. Some of you may relate!

Enjoy! :)

Submitted: August 12, 2015

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Submitted: August 12, 2015

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5 Things I Like

Obsessed Fans Be Like: Ooh! Ranander and Jay! Jayander! When are they gonna have sex!?
Me: Probably before I ever will *starts crying.*

Good Commenters Be Like: *Leaves comment the size of a novel.*
Me: I love you. So damn much.

New Writers Be Like: You’ve inspired me to write my own novel!
Me: Good, I support you, but bitch, don’t copy my work. *Pats new writer on the back and gives them a cookie.*

Authors of Books I Read Be Like: OMG! THANK YOU SO MUCH! I’M DEFINITELY GONNA READ YOUR BOOK.
Me: Oh, stawp it, you *waves arm.*

People Like Me Be Like: You’re novel is awesome. It’s dark, awesome and so fun to read. I love torture, too. Read my book?
Me: Thank you. You’re dark, too? Alright, count me the hell in.

5 Things I Hate

New Writers Be Like: I can’t wait to interact with all you here. I also can’t wait to read all your works!
Me: *Leaves polite request and invite.*
New Writer: …
Me: …
New Writer: …
Me: Ok, fine *goes and cries in a corner.*

Commenters Be Like: I love this so much! KMU!
Me: *jumps around in joy* YES! SCORE! THANK YOU!
*5 Days Later…*
Me: Hey! Next chapter is up!
Commenter: *Never visits your profile again.*
Me: Damn.

Booksie Administrator Be Like: We change featured writing every six months.
Me: *Works hard to get novel noticed and shared.*
*1 Year Later. Featured writing never changed.*
Me: *Throws laptop out the window.* I WORKED SO DAMN HARD!

Authors That Have Horrible Writing Be Like: I know my writing is bad, but check it out anyway. Feel free to request me anything.
Me: *Leaves polite request.*
Author With Horrible Writing: OMG, your novel is crap. You spelt one word wrong, work on your grammar before I die.
Me: Hypocrite.

Random Authors Be Like: I never judge people! I love everyone and all of their works!
Me: Hello! Feel free to check my profile.
Random Author: *stares at profile picture and gets freaked out* No way am I reading about rape and death all the time.
Me: But… but, I don’t go into that detail *cries in corner.*


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