Five Years Older

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
Remembering my estranged brother

Submitted: May 24, 2011

A A A | A A A

Submitted: May 24, 2011

A A A

A A A


Five Years Older


In a way your absence breathes heavier

and clutches tighter than when we hung

out together reveling in our brotherhood

watching the Blues Brothers for the fiftieth

time that summer, that summer, which clawed

at your door like a wolf of winter, a winter

that had not receded from your eyes for years

were we even brothers? From the moment

you thrust your heel in my neck, and returned

to bed, because I'd just not been there, because

my absence burned deeper, peeled away

more layers than you care to dream


Daylight barely maintains the illusion anymore

or so I imagine, and I can only imagine

because we no longer talk of ant hills or measure

the lives of chickens against those of humans

or throw a wrench into the whole bitch

of a disenchanting creation that had become

all that had become all that would ever be

around you, behind you, before you, before

you knew it, I had jetted off to another planet

made an afterlife for myself, as you kept

purgatorial, an off-white hot seething

for that day when I would return


My beard grayish my face granite

from Parkinson's, and you picked me up

at the airport and dropped me off somewhere

apocalyptic, for all the years I had drowned

you had drained, we were no longer brothers

we were no longer anything that could be

measured against even the lives of chickens

a comet had collided with earth, raining down

in pieces at our feet, I watched you drive off

I leaped from my end of the earth and you

from yours. Though I never left your doorway

where the hard wind of weeping walls you in, me out.


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