Blue Demon - Anastasia
Poem by: Shea Ryhai
Blue Demon ~ Anastasia
by Shea Ryhai
My name is Vengeance,
I was born to kill.
I have no master,
to bend my will.
They think I'm boring,
you think I'm dumb.
Here's just a warning,
beware my fun.
The numbers rack up,
another face.
Dare you to disrupt,
my death race.
I have no mother,
and have no home.
But I have my other,
so I'm not alone.
Hunt me for glory,
hunt me for gain.
This is my story,
remember the name.
If you fear demons,
if you fear God.
Then you have reasons,
but this is my job.
When your name's next,
then your time is done.
It's no contest,
too see I'm number One.
© Copyright 2016 Shea Ryhai. All rights reserved.
Comments
P.S. will try to update Bloody Dawn this week xD sorry for the delay
Kay. Anastasia is an amazing character of yours that I love. 5 stars.
If you fear demons,
if you fear God.
Then you have reasons,
but this is my job.
Should you have a period after god? Its more of a fragment than a sentence I think:
If you fear demons,
if you fear God.
and have no home.
But I have my other,
Shouldn't there be since But is a joining word, a coma after home?
My name Is vengeance,
I think you should put is on lowercase and capitalize Vengeance
xD those three things were really kinda... eh bugging me. :P
-Alice
Author
Reply
wow okay... yea the is should have been lower case lol that's a typo. I don't feel the need to put a period after every sentence even if it can stand alone, and I rather resent using (;) so I cheat and go with periods. Poetry isn't about grammatical structure for me. Sorry if that bugs you so much...
This was so very lovely. The structure, the descriptions, and those words. Nice work. Susan :)
Author
Reply
thank you, I appreciate the comment :)
I loved Anastasia :) I like how you describe her split personality subtle here "I have my other so I'm not alone" good poem :D I hope the rewrite is going well
Author
Reply
glad you liked it Trixy thanks for the comment
Dang it I want to read the story!!!!!!!!!! (Behold cries like a baby)
Is Anastasia a serial killer/hitman(hitwoman is probably more appropriate) or something? lol
Author
Reply
yea pretty much thats one part of the story anyway ^.^
I really like it. I'm dissapointed cuz I never got a chance to read the story. But, from what I've heard, it's great. Good luck with the rewrite, shea!
Author
Reply
thank you xD I'll need it still got a lot to do
Wow this was really cool. And it had sort of like a confidence, and fearlessness to it. I like it! Good job! :D
Author
Reply
thank you :) its for a story I've written (well three books about this character but anyway) glad you like it :D
It flows really nice but I think the last 4 lines could use some revising. I am not an expert in poetry, but they just don't sound as smooth as the rest of the poem.
Otherwise really nice piece.
Author
Reply
thank you lol, this isn't really one of my best :) I just wanted to do a poem about one of my characters
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Shea Ryhai