"I Hate Myself"

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
I began writing this poem on April 6th, 2011 and finished it at 8:15 AM on May 4th, 2011.

"I Hate Myself" is about how one girl feels about herself, some of the reasons why, and what she does about it.

Submitted: April 17, 2013

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Submitted: April 17, 2013




“I Hate Myself”

Blinded by tears, consumed by fears,
Afraid to believe a
nything she hears.
Her hatred is rare, uncommon to be said.
She doesn’t hate others, its inner-hatred instead.
Her life hasn’t been a pretty one, she blames herself.
She believes she could have changed it all; she whispers “I hate myself.”
“I don’t want to be here, yet another agonizing day.
Oh please, please save me; take me far away.
Take me to where I feel no pain, where my heart’s at ease.
Take me away, anywhere by here, just take me please.
It’s my fault she died; it’s my fault she’s gone.
I’m the one to blame; I did nothing when I knew all along.
Even if I wasn’t aware that I knew, I’m still the one to blame.
My silence changed everything; nothing will ever be the same.
They all have healed, and I’m left broken inside.
I wish my life had ended the night that she died.
My ways of coping, oh, they shouldn’t be.
It hurts everyone else, pleasing only me.
It’s become my sweet addiction, an uncontrollable desire.
The pain is intoxicating, in a way that I so passionately admire.
The blade is seductive, as it shimmers beneath the light.
I try to resist, but I indulge in my pleasure by the end of the night.”
Her body is scarred from the battles she has faced.
The pain was one exciting; her heart fluttered and her mind raced.
Her hatred for herself, is drawn across her skin,
Due to her guilt, for what happened back then.
She fakes a smile, diminishes a tear, and hides the pain,
Then silently whispers “I hate myself,” as her tears and sorrows drain.


© Copyright 2018 Sierra Lovette. All rights reserved.

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